Mobile is just about the perfect platform for turn-based RPGs, where battles tend to take place in contained, small screen-friendly environments and sessions can be as short or as long as you like.... Tagged as:

Apple today seeded the second beta of an upcoming visionOS 2.2 update to developers for testing purposes, with the beta coming a little over a week after the first visionOS 2.2 beta.


visionOS 2.2 can be installed by going to the Software Update section of the Settings app on the Vision Pro and opting into Beta Updates.

The visionOS 2.2 update adds a new feature for the Mac Virtual Display option, allowing it to be set to Wide and Ultrawide. The Ultrawide setting is equivalent to two 4K displays side-by-side, and it is a notable improvement over the current Mac Virtual Display that's available in visionOS 2.1.

The Mac Virtual Display allows the Vision Pro to be connected to a Mac with the Vision Pro serving as the display for the machine. The virtual Mac desktop works just like a standard desktop with an external display, but Vision Pro does not support multiple displays. As a solution, Apple has added the option for a wider display to maximize space.

This article, "Apple Seeds Second Beta of visionOS 2.2 to Developers With Ultrawide Mac Virtual Display" first appeared on MacRumors.com

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Apple today overhauled the App Store Connect app designed for developers, introducing version 2.0. Developers use App Store Connect to distribute and manage their apps for the iPhone, iPad, Mac, Apple Watch, Apple TV, and Vision Pro.


‌App Store‌ Connect 2.0 includes a refreshed UI throughout the app, as well as new capabilities. Developers are able to promote their apps by generating marketing assets for app launches, version updates, featured placements in the Today tab, and more.

These marketing assets that are generated for special moments can be shared on various social media channels for app promotion purposes.

‌App Store‌ Connect will also now send developers notifications when their app is featured in select placements on the Today tab, such as App of the Day or Game of the Day.

In addition to allowing for app management, ‌App Store‌ Connect also provides support for creating TestFlight betas, monitoring sales and trends, and responding to customer ratings and reviews.

This article, "App Store Connect for Developers Gains Refreshed UI, Feature Notifications and More" first appeared on MacRumors.com

Discuss this article in our forums

In the wake of the devastation rendered by Hurricane Helene, Carolina Furfare released a newsletter on October 1 stating the cancellation of the event that was to occur this weekend, and indicating that the hotels and facilities were needed in order to assist with rescue and sheltering efforts after the Hurricane hit the mountainous region.

This weather event hit the top ten most fatal and costly hurricanes in the United States even before full recovery efforts could be finalized. People who pre-registered have been given the option to roll over to next year, or to Bewhiskered 2025; due to the cancellation being so close to event day they cannot guarantee refunds for now.

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Chris Sanders has only directed four animated features (plus a live action adaptation Call of the Wild), and the previous three (Lilo & Stitch, How to Train your Dragon and The Croods put him in four way tie for most nominations without a win in the Best Animated Feature category at the Oscars. It feels pretty certain that The Wild Robot will be the movie that finally wins him that Oscar, but we'll keep such speculation to a minimum.

Sanders's first feature, Lilo & Stitch, is probably the only truly great movie to come out of Walt Disney Animation Studios in the first decade of this century. (To be clear, you're allowed to like other movies from that decade, but most were flawed.) Anyway, the upshot of Lilo & Stitch becoming a beloved classic is that its directors, Sanders and his writing and directing partner, Dean Deblois, were driven out of Disney by John Lasseter a few years later (I don't like that guy).

Sanders and Deblois took their talents to DreamWorks Animation, where they delivered How to Train Your Dragon to the studio, often seen as one of the highlights of its output.

I've often seen Sanders cast as the "idea guy" in the Sanders/Deblois partnership, as well as being the guy who brings a lot of unique visual aspects to his projects, while Deblois is the more story-driven member of the partnership, bringing in the emotional aspects. I'm not so sure about that, especially after this movie, which features an emotional story just as potent as Lilo & Stitch and How to Train Your Dragon, sans Deblois. The Wild Robot also features a visual design that echoes the original illustrations of the book it's based on, by Peter Brown, showing Sanders is more than just a recognizable art style.

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We have another GIANT list of games this season for the Fall 2024 Steam Next Fest! We're looking forward to a ton of these, and have compiled as many as we could find with animals and/or anthropomorphic characters featured in them! Be sure to let us know of any others you find by commenting below!

We'll be playing some of these demos this week and next, and hopefully providing some previews and progress updates throughout development! Additionally, we have an actively updated Furry & Animal Games List over at @GamingFurever that you can follow and get updates for lots of indie titles with TONS of lovely furry characters!

If you're a developer of any of these games, feel free to hit us up on email over on our Contact Us page!

We're sure everyone will find at least a couple games that strike their fancy during this Next Fest!

Check out the full October list here!

WARNING: READ BEFORE PLAYING

Liar's Bar contains intense and graphic depictions of violence and death, themes of suicide, and other mature content that may not be suitable for all audiences. Player discretion is adviced. If you or someone you know is struggling with thoughts of self-harm or suicide, please seek help from a qualified professional or contact a local mental health service. Your well-being is important to us, and we encourage players to prioritize their mental health while engaging with our game.

The game features mature themes, and is intended for adult audiences only. If you are under 16, please step outside.

This warning is one of the first things you see after booting up Liar's Bar. I want to stress, and I don't care what you think of "trigger warnings", this warning is not kidding. This is a messed up, repugnant game; I think I kind of love it. (It also contains depictions of tobacco use.)

Okay, real talk, this is kind of a dark streak of submissions from this contributor (thank goodness for animated movies ... with jokes about infant mortality!), this game might be the most worrisome yet. I retweeted some fan art of the game, then realized, out of context, that might not look like something entirely, well, healthy to be reposting. Because the marquis attraction of Liar's Bar is that it's basically a furry Russian roulette simulator. Just so you know what you're getting into.

Liar's Bar is published by Curve Animation, and is currently available on Steam for $6.99, where it is still an "Early Access" game.

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"It's a brutal world for all of us, really, and some aspects of it are not comfortable for the sentimental or the squeamish. Somehow that's never dimmed my love for all animals. I celebrate their beauty, even the darker side of it." (Introduction, The Book of Deadly Animals)

"The predators far outnumbered the vegetarians."
(last words, The Red Hourglass: Lives of the Predators)

It's October, the "spooky" month with Halloween at the end of it; I sometimes take advantage of that to bring to light something a bit more horror themed than the usual Flayrah fare.

This year, I'd like to share the non-fiction books of Gordon Grice, which are about animals and their sometimes very tense relationship with man, because they are some of the scariest things I've ever read, and so appropriate enough under the "it's about animals and it's spooky" month to stretch the boundaries of what a furry publication can cover. Furthermore, from a personal angle, Grice spent much of his life where I'm originally from, the Oklahoma Panhandle (we share a birth town), and I occasionally like to shine a light on what would be to me local authors.

"The Red Hourglass: Lives of the Predators", Delacourte Press, 1998, 259 pages, Kindle $5.99, hardcover $19.32, paperback $17.10
"The Book of Deadly Animals", Penguin Books Ltd., 2010, xxvii + 383 pages, Kindle $4.99, paperback $24.00, illustrated, originally published as Deadly Kingdom

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If there's one furry series I should be completely behind, but have always been a bit down on, it's Illumination's Sing franchise. The series is set in a completely furry world, with a complete lack of humans – something I can always get behind. And yet, I can't ever quite get behind them.

I think if I had to put my finger on what's wrong, it's that the Sing movies feel like the Illumination version of Oscar bait, being behind the scenes musicals that ostensibly celebrate the performing arts, something Academy Awards voters should, in theory, love; and yet, they can't even get the easy lay up of Best Original Song, which is straightforwardly embarrassing for movies called, well, Sing. It's not that they're failed Oscar Bait, it's that they're not going for Best Picture, or even Best Animated Feature, but simply seem to be aiming to be nominated in that category. They're not aiming for the top, and they're still missing!

Or maybe I'm just being too hard on them, and displacing my own Oscar obsessions on this otherwise innocuous series of jukebox musicals with no higher goal than to be entertaining bits of fluff. The newest entry in the franchise, if it can be called that, is just that. Sing: Thriller is a short available on Netflix, and it features a simple take on a nightmare zombie apocalypse, but furry and kid-friendly; an obvious homage to Michael Jackson's Thriller. It's definitely for kids, with a rating of TV-Y, for "fear", which I think would only apply to the absolute youngest viewers.

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COVID-19 antibodies have been found in blood samples as early as September, 2019. China knew about the virus' transmission to humans months before it announced such to the world. Why has the media and our government not investigated this gross negligence, if not mass murder? Continue reading →

Darryl Cooper, AKA @MartyrMade, is a podcaster who had a Twitter thread go viral with 13k retweets and 20k likes of the first Tweet alone. This one is 36-Tweets long. It makes very cogent arguments of not only why millions of Trump supporters believe the 2020 election was stolen, but also why we are justified to believe it. Continue reading →

The government is instructing social media companies what should and shouldn't be allowed to be on the internet, these are the people least competent to judge what is misinformation. Continue reading →

Bantam Tools Acquires Evil Mad Scientist to Accelerate Development of Next Generation Art and Handwriting Machines Windell Oskay and Lenore Edman of Evil Mad Scientist named CTO and COO of Bantam Tools  PEEKSKILL, N.Y, January 16, 2024 — Bantam Tools, the desktop CNC manufacturer that builds exceptional computer controlled machines for innovators, is excited to … Continue reading Bantam Tools Acquires Evil Mad Scientist →

Check out an exclusive preview of Marco Finnegan's supernatural noir CALAVERA P.I. #2, due out from Oni Press next month.

The first volume of Eden of Witches releases on Nov. 12.

The Small-Animallike Lady is Adored by the Ice Prince is a brand new romance manga from Yen Press. This first volume takes us to a familiar setting where there's a royal arranged marriage involved, and some frozen hearts are melted along the way!

Henry Barajas' Death To Pachuco , a Chicano noir set in the Zoot Suit Riots, is now live on Kickstarter

When we wake up to who we are, something happens. We stop identifying with our egoic selves because we realize they are impermanent and only that which is permanent can be who we are.

We aren’t our bodies, we aren’t our memories, we aren’t our thoughts, we aren’t our feelings… We aren’t any of these things, so we stop identifying with them. What happens is that detachment develops. An aloofness or distancing from everything that occurs. We wake up to the fact that life is an extended dream and a relaxation is able to set in. It’s a sense of calm or a feeling that ‘all is well.’

We lose our identity with our lives, thoughts and feelings, so we witness them but we don’t engage with them. We notice them, but we don’t create stories with them. Since we don’t create ... Read More »

The post The Paradoxical World of Spiritual Enlightenment: We are nothing but we are everything appeared first on Enlightenment Podcast.

Recently, Apple rejected a digital book application from Sony. The disagreement here is over how and when Apple collects for its services. Apple is playing a dangerous game.

In theory, Apple has the right to insist, under its terms for developers, that any app, which offers customers the ability to purchase books outside of the app, offer the ability for customers to purchase within the app at the same time.

Here is the rub. In its application, Sony sends customers to its own web site where they complete the purchase of a book. By routing the customers to its own web site, Sony is able to avoid a payment of 30% of revenues to Apple.

Others, including Amazon, with its Kindle, and Barnes & Noble, with its Nook, have been able to sell e-books by sending users to the companys’ own web sites. Apple simply was not enforcing its policy requiring developers to use its in-app purchasing feature to buy new content.

A 30% charge on revenues is a high price to pay Apple. Apple may be setting itself up for future loss of market share by enforcing this policy. If the Android platform does not put the same requirement on its app developers, the developers will have a strong incentive to avoid the 30% charge by encouraging customers to purchase using an Android device rather than an Apple device. Alternatively, the application developers may charge a higher price for purchases through Apple.

Apple’s unique strength has been its superior list of available applications. Apple’s enforcement of this requirement to purchase inside the app so that Apple can collect 30% of the revenues puts at risk its major advantage. Apple needs to compromise here by charging a lower price or no price at all. After all, it already makes high profits on its hardware and software product combination. It also makes profits on many of the downloaded apps. The application developers are customers too. Why make their life difficult? Does the benefit Apple provides a seller justify 30% of revenues? Sounds pretty rich.

Don’t look now, but we are entering the world of F-commerce. What is that, those of you older than thirty will ask? F-commerce is selling through a Facebook page.

The trend is early yet, but likely to turn into a stampede. JC Penney and 1-800-Flowers.com both have established full E-commerce stores within their Facebook page. The stores include check-out and other features you typically find on an E-commerce web site. Facebook claims that twenty-five of the largest retail sites are already integrated with Facebook, as are seventeen of the twenty-five fastest growing retail sites.

Think of Facebook as a virtual mall. There are all kinds of people wandering around there, talking to one another. Facebook offers a nice opportunity for a company to interact with customers and allow them to bring their friends into the conversation to evaluate styles and colors and so forth. If a company integrates its storefront with the Facebook page, its Facebook “friends” will never have to leave the virtual mall in order to purchase. This is an important product innovation.

Product innovations reduce customers’ effective costs in one of three ways: add information about the product and how it is to be used, reduce the resources the customer must use with the product, or improve the customer’s experience with the product.

This innovation improves the customer’s experience with the product by increasing the customer’s sense of security in using the product. It allows the customer to get her friends’ opinions on what she is purchasing. Secondarily, the Facebook store reduces the customer’s resources used with the product by reducing the time the customer must spend in using the product. The innovation reduces the steps the customer must take to make a purchase and it places the company’s product closer to the customer’s location.

This is going to be a train to the destination of millions of customers. Every mainstream retailer has to get on board.

Go here: http://vtaperphysique.com/stage-shredded-status

NOTE: The workout is a "GIANT" set or "Tri" set. You will do all three exercises together for quads for 3-5 circuits. When finished with quads move on to hamstrings

(QUADS)

Barbell Squat 6 reps
Bulgarian Split Squat (Dumbbell Lunge) 12 reps
Leg Extensions 25 reps

Rest for 2 minutes and repeat for 3-5 more circuits.

(HAMSTRINGS)

Deadlifts 6 reps
Lying Leg curl 12 reps
Hyper extensions 25 reps

rest for 2 minutes and repeat for 3-5 circuits.

If you want to know more about Vince Delmonte's training programs he as a FREE video of an awesome presentation on how he got his pro card at the WBFF and went on to be a pro fitness model. He takes you behind the scenes at a rare look of what it takes to get super RIPPED and Shredded, just in time for summer! This video will not be up for VERY LONG!!!
Go here: http://vtaperphysique.com/stage-shredded-status

Alright, today we're going to cover some common questions you may have
about the Stage Shredded Status DVD's before
they sell out...

==> Click here to learn how this transformation went down...


If you've seen the video but have some questions before ordering:

Question: Is SSS a documentary of Vince Delmonte's transformation or is there an actual program included?

Answer: Yes, SSS includes an entire program (covered on 3 of the 8 disks) and it was filmed with former NFL lineman and NPC level bodybuilder Ryan Watson! They are both pretty jacked up in this workout so it's pretty motivating too!

What Vince is going to do for anyone who orders is send you the printable workout sheets of the Stage Shredded Status workout program! Just email him your receipt to the help desk for proof of purchase!

You'll love this program because it relies on a variance of rep ranges to target, specifically, the Type 11a & Type 1a muscle fibers which create the training effect of
hypertrophy and strength-endurance. The combos generate a lot of lactate to boost growth hormone levels to assist in fat loss. You don't do super heavy loads because heavy lifting does not involve enough mechanical stress to promote fat loss.
Plus, you would not normally lift super heavy when you get leaner because your joints have less fluid and fat to protect them from the bigger forces.

Question: What if I have more than 50 lbs to lose?

Answer: Heck, Vince had 30 lbs to lose so you're programming
is going to be no different than his. The only difference is that you have an extra 8-10 weeks to travel. Let's go!

==> Get 6-Pack Abs By Summertime!



Question: Is SSS for a complete beginner?

Answer: If Vince only cared about selling his DVD's I would say yes but if you have less than one year experience in his crazy fitness world, you'll probably find his approach a little too hardcore for now. Sit this one up unless you're absolutely intrigued to see how this goes down.

The weight training program is far too advanced and you would be better off learning the nutritional principles in No Nonsense Muscle Building, which focuses on a balanced approach to eating. You need to master a balanced
approach before implementing some of the more advanced things they did.

Question: I noticed you had an ENTIRE cupboard full of supplements.
Am I supposed to take all of those?!?!

Answer: When it comes to supplementation, that's a personal choice.

In the DVD's Vince explains WHY he takes what he takes and encourages you to just sit back and consider it an educational experience. Then, as you choose, start to add one new supplement a month and measure
the response. There are SO MANY supplements he's interested in trying himself but he likes to add one new thing at a time so he will get there when he gets there.

Question: What if I only have 10 lbs of fat to lose?

Answer: Again, the same principles apply and you'll learn how Vince adjusted his cardio intensity and frequency as he gets closer to the show to ensure he does not lose muscle the last few weeks.

You'll see EXACTLY how he changed his diet from phase to phase (He changed it three times throughout the 16 weeks) and you'll see some creative ways to switch around your macros and food sources
that assist with fat loss, WITHOUT dropping your calories.

==> Get 6-Pack Abs By Summertime!

Question: Is Ben Pakulski in any of the DVD's?

Answer: YES! The first 2 DVDs start off in Toronto when Vince is looking pretty bulky and they get 2 hours of coaching on the gym floor with Ben & Intentions! If you bought MI40 then you already have this footage but it's worth reviewing and owning it on hardcopy. I know that every time I watch this footage, I re learn something new and then BOOM, I have a better workout!

If you don't have this footage, heck, the first 2 hours is worth 3x the price of the DVDs because Ben bills $150 an hour! This is the kind of information that propelled him into the ranks of the top ten bodybuilders in the world this past month!

Question: How long are the DVDs on sale?

Answer: It depends... we have about 550 left in stock now and the $50 off sale ends Sunday night or whenever he sells out... Whatever comes first.

Trust that helps and THANK YOU for your interest in Vince's work. This is, by far, the best fat loss resource he's ever released. Grab it while you can!

Here is the $50 Off Discount link to get your DVDs shipped right now!

Get 6-Pack Abs By Summertime!


P.S. Vince ships all over the world!

It's another Monday morning in sunny Florida and I'm pumped to give you some rich content on any area of your physique goals.   What area of your physique you wish could be better?  Is there a part of your physique that's a lagging body part.  Well let's face it, we all have areas where we would like to improve.  I'm  here to tell you that I'm here to help.   Let's face it, you  would not of subscribed to my newsletters if you didn't want to improve on some area of your physique, unless you only wanted the free report on Ben Pakulski's training methods.  If that's the case, that's cool.  We all want free stuff, I know I do! I want to give you as much free stuff as possible.  I want to give you rich and rewarding content.  That being said I'm here to help you with your personal physique goals.  All you have to do is tell me what you want.  I'm ready to do some videos for you so that you can achieve any physique you want.  I need your feedback though. Whatever you are striving for, NEVER Give Up!

Do I want to live forever?


When I was a child I desperately wanted to live forever. I think most kids did. It was one of those fantasy things.


Today my thoughts have changed quite a bit. I now believe that once I pass beyond the veil in death that I will eventually come back to live again through reincarnation. This, in a way, is living forever. One of the biggest draw back from actually living forever is that everyone you care about will pass beyond and leave you. Yea you will make new friends and lovers but they too will pass beyond and leave you to move in an endless cycle. Oh sure it would be interesting to experience the advances, turmoil, wars, times of peace, and other things, I don't believe that would make the endless cycle of loss easier.


Today we are infatuated with the concept of eternal life in the form of vampires in such movies as the Twilight Saga and TV shows like True Blood and Vampire Diaries. Yes they live 'forever' but they must also suffer with living forever.


For me I look forward to seeing The Summerland, to enjoy a rest before returning and living again.  That being said I expect to live well into my 90's.  Gods willing.


Blessed Be.

Being a relatively visible public Witch, I get plenty of requests for spells, which I politely decline to do. I tell people two things: One is that it's best to create one's own spells rather than have someone else cast them. The other is a caution against performing any magic that would interfere with the free will of another. The exception to that would be a binding of someone else, making them unable to do further harm.

If you believe someone has put a negative spell on you (usually called a hex), here are a few things you can do to protect yourself, and possibly reverse the spell.

First, purify your person. Take a shower, or better yet, soak for a while in hot water containing sea salt, bath salts, or Epsom salts. Allow the salt and water to neutralize any negativity within yourself; think of this as you soak. Let any contamination be washed away with the water spiraling down the drain, out of your house and out of your life. Drink lots of water to wash out your insides. Wash your hair, brush your teeth, put on clean clothes. You may also wish to drink mint tea or another tea that you find refreshing.

Second, purify your dwelling. Dust, sweep, vacuum, tidy up, polish. Air out the rooms. Wash the windows with a mild solution of vinegar and water. This allows purifying sunlight and moonlight to illuminate the room as well as making the glass more reflective to deflect unwanted energies.[1]

Circulate through the rooms where you live with sage or other purifying incense, making sure to fumigate everywhere -- stairways, closets, underneath stairways, basement, attic, garage if attached. If your dwelling is one that you can circumnavigate, you may wish to walk all around the outside of the building wafting this smoke.

Then mix salt and water and sprinkle it around the house. As with the incense, do this around the outside of the home, too, if you can. Be sure to cense and sprinkle all openings to the outside -- doors and windows, of course, but also skylights, electrical outlets, heating vents, chimneys, ventilator hoods, toilets, and sink, tub and shower drains. Also do this to mirrors.

While you're doing these things, speak the words, "With Earth and Water I purify this space," and "with Fire and Air I consecrate this space," because that's exactly what you're doing.[2]

Third, ward your space. If you're the witchy sort, trace a protective pentacle with the salt water on all doors, windows and mirrors. Rosemary grows in abundance where I live, so I like to use a sprig of it to sprinkle the salt water. Then I like to leave rosemary sprigs on all the window sills.

When you've done all these things, take a step back, be very quiet, look around, listen and note how different your space feels to you now.

You may also wish to perform these acts at other places where you spend a lot of time, such as work, if you can.

One last thing you may want to do, although it's not as easy and practical as the rest. You may wish to hang little mirrors in the windows or on the outside of the building to reflect away negativity. The mirrors aren't really necessary; they're just extra insurance, if you will. You should be fine just doing the other things I've recommended.

Now envision yourself within a bubble. Project this bubble around you and around your home. Nothing can pass through the membrane that has not been invited by you. Anything unwelcome bounces off the bubble. Build a strong image of this bubble in your mind. If you have a small object, maybe a clear quartz crystal or a piece of rosemary, that reminds you of this visualization, carry it in your pocket or keep it someplace handy. You can't be expected to hold this image in your consciousness all the time. But if you have this object, then at times when the image has faded and you feel you need to reinforce your working, take it out and look at it and touch it to reawaken your sense of your protective bubble.

As with all magic spells, you needn't stick with the formula offered here. If other ingredients call to you or other actions spring from you, trust your intuition and go with them.

These are my recommendations. For another approach, here's a Lemon UncrossingSpell (to break a curse). I have never tried this so I can offer no assurance of its efficacy.

[1] For a super-duper heavy cleansing of a home, say if you're just moving in after someone else has been living there, and if you have the time, get some dragon's blood incense and burn it on a piece of charcoal in a container left in the bathtub or shower. As soon as you light it, leave and let it fumigate the entire house. You don't want to breathe much of this stuff. Then return a few hours later and open all the windows to let out the dragon's blood fumes.

[2] Some additional things you can do to cleanse a new or dirty home: Walk throughout the rooms with noisemakers, rattles, a drum to frighten off unwanted spirits. Do this before censing and sprinkling. After censing and sprinkling, ring a little bell at the windows and mirrors.

 REVISION #1

Question: When comping a series, does the 3-year rule apply to the most recent installment or to the first?  What if the series hasn't been concluded yet? 

You want to use comps that are as close to the specs of your book as you can. That means using the first book of any series because yours is the first book in your series. And you want that first book to have been pubbed recently, no earlier than 2018 and 2019 is better.

If you're banging your head against the wall on a comp search, you're doing it right. 

 

Dear Query Shark,

 

Three years ago, Aman once had an entire barn full of horses he loved.  Unfortunately for them, the Düzen were desperate for food.

 

Three years ago, Düzen soldiers invaded Aman's village, slaughtering the animals he had been entrusted with.   

Let's put this sentence about the Düzen soldiers in the first paragraph, then start the next paragraph where there's a shift in time.

 

Thus:

Three years ago, Aman once had an entire barn full of horses he loved.  Unfortunately for them, the Düzen were desperate for food.  Düzen soldiers invaded Aman's village, slaughtering the animals he had been entrusted with.

 

 

 New paragraph here for shift in time.

Now in his early twenties, Aman serves in the Corthiaks' heavy cavalry, hiding his guilt, grief, and self-loathing from his fellow soldiers.  His only source of hope, the one horse he has left, is old and inexperienced with combat—far from an ideal war horse.   

 

I stumbled over source of hope here because we don't have any sense of what Aman wants. You've described how he is now, but not what he wants.

 

Surrounded by hardened warriors and their younger, better-trained steeds, (some of whom aren't even horses,) Aman can't help but wonder if he or his horse really belong here.

 

I am intrigued by a cavalry that doesn't have horses, that's a nice detail to include. 

 

The Düzen have a new king, named Karib, and he wants peace with the Corthiaks.   

 

And here is where I lose the thread of the plot. 

 

Aman is sent to recount the story of his village to Karib, but he didn't take his last horse into war so that he could forgive the Düzen.  

After all, Karib believes that animal welfare means nothing in times of human suffering.  He and his soldiers would kill this horse in a heartbeat, along with anything else that isn't human.  

 

 Well, the Düzen should all burn in hell of course BUT you've set them up here. In the first paragraph, they slaughtered horses for food. Understandable but yucky. But here they are simply equicidal maniacs and that's a whole different bucket of entrails.

If Karib wants peace, what's standing in his way? What does Aman need to do?

Whether from a negotiator's seat or a war saddle, Aman must show Karib that animals are worth more than their weight on a butcher's scale. 

or what? The or what is what's at stake, and that's what you need here. 

 

 One will have him face difficult questions about the value of animal life and the ethics of eating meat, but the other will pit him against hordes of infantry that outnumber the Corthiaks forty to one, volleys of arrows that darken the skies, and rideable, venomous, twenty-foot carnivorous lizards.   

 

This sentence is 49 words long. That means it's got too much information in it for your reader to absorb easily.  Let's cut it down to two or three shorter sentences for easier understanding. 

 

 One will have him face difficult questions about the value of animal life and the ethics of eating meat.

One what? It's not clear who/what you mean. 

 

 Nothing is more off-putting in an otherwise good query than the idea the book is some message driven polemic. No one reads novels to hear about the ethics of eating meat. They read novels for the story.

 

If you want themes about the ethics of eating meat in the novel, that's up to you, but here in the query focus on the story.

 

but The other will pit him against hordes of infantry that outnumber the Corthiaks forty to one, volleys of arrows that darken the skies, and rideable, venomous, twenty-foot carnivorous lizards.   

 

This is an odd choice in that they don't seem to be alternatives. You can philosophize about eating meat while you battle lizards. There doesn't seem to be an either/or here, and that's what you need. 

 

Either way, he cannot hope to succeed without his fellow cavalrymen, and the horse who has carried him all this way.

CURSORIAL is an 82,000-word work of adult fantasy. You can add here: It explores themes of the ethics of eating plants etc.  

You can mention themes here (rather than above). I know I've said in earlier QS posts that you don't need them, and you don't BUT it can help elevate the query beyond plot points and characters.

 

It will appeal to fans of The Masquerade (by Seth Dickinson) 

When you list comps in a query, the first thing I do is look at the books on Amazon. The Masquerade appears to be the name of the series, not the first book. And the first book, The Traitor Baru Cormorant, was pubbed in 2016.   You need to use titles of books, not series. Sales figures are by book, and that's what we look at.  And of course, the book is too old to be an effective comp.

 But the description of the book is utterly compelling. 

Tomorrow, on the beach, Baru Cormorant will look up and see red sails on the horizon.

The Empire of Masks is coming, armed with coin and ink, doctrine and compass, soap and lies. They will conquer Baru’s island, rewrite her culture, criminalize her customs, and dispose of one of her fathers. But Baru is patient. She'll swallow her hate, join the Masquerade, and claw her way high enough up the rungs of power to set her people free.

To test her loyalty, the Masquerade will send Baru to bring order to distant Aurdwynn, a snakepit of rebels, informants, and seditious dukes. But Baru is a savant in games of power, as ruthless in her tactics as she is fixated on her goals. In the calculus of her schemes, all ledgers must be balanced, and the price of liberation paid in full.

 If I saw that in a query I'd fall all over myself to request the full.

The closer you can come to this vivid writing, the better.

 

and The Unbroken (by C. L. Clark).

 

 Don't put parentheses around the author's names.

I've seen a lot of that recently. There's probably some query advice that says to do so, but don't. 

 

I'm an equestrian, and an absolute geek for natural history, paleontology, medieval warfare, power metal music, and the color green. This is a terrific bio. It's the most vivid thing in the query. That tells me you're holding back in the query, maybe trying to be all serious and business like. Businesslike does not mean flat. Vivify!

 

Thank you for your time and consideration.

 I don't have a sense of the plot there that would compel me to request a full.

What does Aman want?

What does Karib want?

What's getting in the way of each of them getting it?

What choices do they face?  What sacrifices will be required?

 

Don't get lost in the weeds with lizards and vegans.

Focus on the plot. 

 

 

 ******

Original query

Question: I realize my comp titles are rather old, but I find them to be the best representatives of the emotional tone of this story. I've literally had beta readers tell me that they can't think of comp titles, so I went with my gut on this one. Is it a dealbreaker that the most recent comp title is almost 20 years old now?

Yes.

Comp titles need to be recent, no more than three years old (no earlier than 2018).

It's not up to your beta readers to find them (nice try). This is your job.

Dear Query Shark,

Aman once had an entire barn full of horses he loved. Today, only one of them is still alive.

Aman and his horse, Arty, barely survived when the Sacramouth army invaded their village and slaughtered everything in sight.

I thought Sacramouth was a person. Turns out, later in the query, it's a country. To avoid that misapprehension you might add the army.

Three years have since passed, and Aman and Arty now serve in Aerdoth's heavy cavalry together, seeking vengeance against the people who took everything from them.

You need to tell us what problem Aman faces. You have to get plot on the page here.


To Aman's dismay, the King of Sacramouth agrees to host a series of peace talks with Aerdoth. Aman is sent as an ambassador to recount his story to the King, but refuses to forgive him for what his country did. However, as the peace talks begin, the King proves to be more persuasive than even Aman could have foreseen.

Persuasive about what? The last thing you want to do in a query is be coy!

The threat of war looms throughout the negotiations, and Aman faces difficult questions about the value of animal life, his own capability, and the relationships that he chooses to make. His only hopes of success lie within his own intuition, his fellow cavalrymen, and of course, Arty.

The plot is not clear. Aman faces difficult questions, ok, but what problem does he have? You've said his only hope of success, but success at what? Plot must be on the page.


CURSORIAL is a 55,000-word war story that skirts the line between fantasy and ecofiction.

This is fantasy. The question is which shelf: adult or MG.

You have an adult plot and it sounds like Aman is also an adult (or at least not a child.)

But 55K is way too short for an adult fantasy novel. Fantasy needs world building and world building needs words. And the comps below are kids.


It closely follows the bond between horse and rider,

Really? Cause there's no sense of that here in the query.


inspired greatly by works such as War Horse (by Michael Morpurgo) and Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron. The story can stand alone, but is also the first of a planned series.

War Horse is for grades 4-7. Spirit is an animated movie (not a book) ie for kids. That and your word count signal make me think this is not an adult book.


I'm an equestrian, and an absolute geek for natural history, paleontology, medieval warfare, and the color green.

Thank you for your time and consideration.


Another thing that leaps off the page to me is the plethora of A-names: Aman, Arty, Aerdoth.

But the biggest problem here is you don't know your shelf. You've got adult themes, and MG comps.

This is confusing, and confusing often leads to an instant pass.

If you can't find suitable comps, you're searching too narrowly OR you haven't read enough in your category.

If you're having trouble finding comps you might try reading reviews in Publishers Weekly (which is NOT the same as Publishers Marketplace). Your library has a subscription to PW, but they don't put it out in the circulation area. You'll have to ask. Read the reviews going back a year or two. It will take you a while, but it's worth it.

Get plot on the page, and get comps that reflect the book.

 

REVISION #1

Dear Query Shark,

 

I am writing to you seeking representation for my 122,000-word adult fantasy novel THE CROSSOVER.

This is better than the 137K you had the first time, but paring down to under 120K is a good idea.

 

The last thing you want is an agent seeing the word count and swiping left without reading another word.

 

When ELENORE and BENAIAH

don't cap character names.

 

 inadvertently stumble across a portal to another world.

 Elenore just wants to gather evidence of their strange discovery to prove it to her university colleagues.

 

None of this matters, not really.

The story starts when they arrive in Swordlandia.

 

Let's refocus to make that clear.

 

Driven by her curiosity, she

 

 

Eleanora and Ben find a portal and of course, they want to see where it leads.

 

She leads Ben, her horse, and her dog through the portal.

Not to pick nits but did you notice the dog is never mentioned again?

Having your dog with you in a strange land would be comforting, no?

And does the dog get superpowers too?

 

 

They pop popping out in an entirely different universe.

 

This is a big moment in the query. Making it a separate short sentence gives it power and drama.

 

You want to stay in Elenore's point of view here, so let's revise this:

 

Two sword-bearing forces arrive with one obvious goal:

They're met by two, separate sword-bearing forces.

 

Let's add separate here so the reader doesn't think these are two platoons of the same company.

 

 

capture the strangers from another world.

We don't really need to know what the SBFs want. They're not the important antagonist.

 

 Elenore is captured by the king's brigade, and Ben is captured by the resistance movement. against the king.

Let your reader do some of the work here. If you say resistance movement, the reader will fill in that they're resisting the King. 

 

 

From their captors inform them that they learn that when they entered the portal, they passed through “the pathways” and  coming through the portal developed gave them abilities  that allow them to wield energy from the space between worlds.

 

Out of desperation to

Desperate to reunite and return home, Elenore and Ben accept separate, yet similar deals.

 

So, you learn you have superpowers. What's the first thing you want to do?

Give them up and go home?

Really?

 

Cause if you told me I had superpowers, I'd want to know what they were, and how I could use them to do fun stuff, like fly (Sharknado!), or eat ice cream without sacrificing my svelte sharkly silhouette, or get the world to quit using the phrase safety deposit box (it's safe deposit box, and yes this is a hill I will die on.)

 

 

But here you have her using her abilities (still unspecified) to do something that she doesn't have a stake in. Why would she do it?

 

When we're puzzled by why a character acts in what seems to be an illogical or unrealistic way, we're NOT engaged.  You want your readers to engage, to care what happens to Elenore (and the dog!!!)

 

Elenore agrees to use her new abilities to help the king recapture the same city where Ben is held, and Ben agrees to use his powers to aid in the movement  resistance and to dethrone the king who captured Elenore.

 

These two characters don't seem to have much depth or personality.

It's ESSENTIAL that your characters be interesting and right now they seem lacking in imagination or sense of adventure.

 

 As part of the deal, Elenore gains a vast understanding of the nature of time, reality, and mortality from the space between worlds.

 

Well, that's nice but what can she DO?

 

 Despite that knowledge, she doesn’t realize the danger they are in.

Of course not. What's the fun of that.

 

 

 

VICTORIA, Elenore’s mentor,

 

wait, what?
Who the heck is Victoria?

And WHERE is she? As in which side of the portal.

 

Introducing a main character this late in the game is confusing.

 

 

 

 

has no idea that she is fated to inadvertently catalyze the end of the universe, causing it to be wiped from existence layer by layer. 

 

Ho hum.

If a character is fated for something they don't have any choice in the matter.

The essence of a good story is what choices the characters face and what path they choose.

 

 

 

Ben’s captor, the leader of the resistance movement against the king, might be the only one with information on how to prevent the destruction of the universe and has no intentions of sharing it. Unaware of their larger role, Elenore and Ben are sure their hardships will come to an end if they can manage to avoid manipulation and survive long enough to see the deal through, but it is only a matter of time before Victoria finds a way to seize power from the king, setting the unraveling of the universe into motion.

 

Ok, who's the antagonist here?

 

You've got (as you did in the first version) too much going on.

You don't need as much world building as you think.

 

You need to focus on Elenore. She seems to be the main character.

What does she want?

Make sure what she wants makes sense to us the reader.

You're in an alien world with superpowers! What would you want to do?

 

Then give us a sense of the dilemma she faces

There must be some sort of conflict or there's no plot.

 

 

You do need more three-dimensional characters and we must have a better sense of choices and stakes.

 

 

 

The style, tone, and characters of THE CROSSOVER will appeal to readers of are most comparable to A.K. Larkwood’s The Unspoken Name meets and Matt Haig’s The Midnight Library.

 

 

Here's the description of The Unspoken Name

What if you knew how and when you will die?

Csorwe does—she will climb the mountain, enter the Shrine of the Unspoken, and gain the most honored title: sacrifice.

But on the day of her foretold death, a powerful mage offers her a new fate. Leave with him, and live. Turn away from her destiny and her god to become a thief, a spy, an assassin—the wizard's loyal sword. Topple an empire and help him reclaim his seat of power.

But Csorwe will soon learn—gods remember, and if you live long enough, all debts come due.

 

Notice there is almost NO world building.

There's one sentence of set up.

The choices the main character faces are clear, as are the stakes.

All in fewer than 100 words.

This is your goal.

 

You have 380 in the query.

 

It is intended to be the first installment of a series that I hope will span 3-5 books.

It can stand alone but I envision it as the start of a series

 

new paragraph for personalization

(Insert personalization here).

I am querying you because you like kale and I like rabbits (or whatever.)

 

 

Thank you for your consideration,

 

 

Focus.

Pare down the events and increase character development.

 

There are a million portal stories in my inbox.

Show me (don't tell me) how yours is better, faster, more enticing.

 

I'd start with the dog.

That's interesting.

 

Dogs? DOGS??

 

 

 

 

******

Initial query

Question/Concern:

I have been submitting queries to agents since May of 2022 and have only received kind rejections so far. I have decided to blame this on my query letter for now, and so I come to you with my struggle after reading the archives. I have a complex first installment of a fantasy series in progress, and it seems impossible to include the necessary information in a concise manner. I have left many important characters unmentioned, and I have failed to include the aspect of my plot that involves the protagonist's impending trek through the infinite layers of an infinite universe in a war of fate and freewill. In addition to that, I feel that some of the appealing aspects of my book, like the presence of ghosts and alternate timelines, alternating chapter perspectives, intricate arcs, and relatable societal problems can't be included without getting to a 1200 word query letter.

Dear Query Shark,

 

 I am writing to seek representation for THE CROSSOVER, which is a 137,000-word new adult, fantasy fiction novel.

 

For starters, your word count is high. 137K is an auto-pass for many agents.

Your category, new adult, is one that you might see referenced on Goodreads etc., but isn't all that useful for queries. New Adult started as a way to categorize books for readers above the YA age range (that tops out at 18.)

 

All too quickly it morphed into porn light. Think 50 Shades of Grey.

 

Now it's trying to make a comeback but in a query you want to use the most solid description you can. Your book is fantasy. You don't need to say fiction, cause fantasy is not non-fiction. (Current events not withstanding.)

 

And fiction novel is an instant pass for a lot of us.

 

So: The Crossover (137,000 words) is fantasy.

 

Except when you start with this, it just gives agents permission to pass without reading another word.  That's why I suggest you put this at the close of the query, NO MATTER WHAT.

 

 

(Personalize for agent here).

Personalization goes below as well. So many writers botch this up that it's just safer not to lead with it.

 

Comps go at the end too.

And you can NOT use Stephen King as a comp. He is in a category by himself. People read his books just cause he wrote them.  You don't have that advantage yet.

 

 

THE CROSSOVER is most comparable to Stephen King’s newest novel Fairy Tale mixed with Leigh Bardugo’s Shadow and Bone.

 

Shadow and Bone was first pubbed in 2013. It's too old to be an effective comp.

 

 

ELENORE (23), a curiosity-driven student of science,

This is not a police blotter, or a newspaper article. Don't put the ages in parenthesis.

 

and BENAIAH (Ben, 22), her grumbly companion with a heart of gold,

 

heart of gold is a cliche.

Agents are looking for things that are fresh and new.

 

 

inadvertently stumble across a portal to another world on their rental property in Indiana.

 

Elenore’s desire to prove their discovery compels them to enter the undulating void despite a vague, menacing message found graffitied on their wall promising death to Ben should they go.

 

What?

What does prove their discovery mean?

Also, try this without all the modifiers.

 

Elenore’s desire to prove their discovery compels them to enter the undulating void despite a vague, menacing message found graffitied on their wall promising death to Ben should they go.

 

A lot easier to understand without all the descriptors.

 

Over-modifying is a common flaw in early work.

Watch for it, and pluck out everything you don't need.

And you don't need anywhere near as much filigree as you think.

 

 

After entering the portal and becoming separated by the sword-bearing forces in the Kingdom of Corva, Elenore and Ben are informed that when they entered the portal, they passed through “the pathways” and developed abilities.

 

This sentence is 35 words long.

That means you've got too much information for your reader to readily absorb.

Short form work like a query usually means you want short sentences.

 

 

Other people have some abilities, but allegedly, none can wield the pathways like those that walk through time.

 

The construction of this sentence seems to convey that pathways walk through time.

My guess is that's not what you mean.

An easy fix is just to change out that for who.

Other people have some abilities, but allegedly, none can wield the pathways like those who walk through time.

According to the warring rulers, Elenore and Ben are potentially the most powerful in the kingdom. Out of desperation, Elenore and Ben accept similar deals by agreeing to help in the conflict that envelopes the kingdom in exchange for help returning home.

 

At this point I'm utterly befuddled.

 

Unbeknownst to Elenore, Victoria, her mentor and advisor to the misguided King Gael, has a vicious ambition to seize power. Despite the knowledge Elenore gains on her journey, she doesn’t realize the danger they are in. Opal, the scheming, untrustworthy leader of the resistance movement that captured Ben, is the only one who understands the extent of the danger they are in, and she intends to use the knowledge to bargain for her life when Elenore and the king invade the city she holds. Meanwhile, Victoria  has no idea her antagonistic actions will eventually lead to the collapse of the infinite layers in their cyclical universe. Even worse, Elenore, Ben, a dog, and several other friends are the only ones that stand a chance of altering fate enough to prevent it. They must decide between risking their lives for a foreign universe or living with the guilt of doing nothing to prevent its demise.

 

There's so much information here it's impossible to follow.

 

In a query you don't need anywhere near this much detail.

 What you need is:

What does the main character want?

What's blocking them from getting it?

What choices do they face?

What's at stake with those choices?

 

That's all you need.

 

 

I have been writing for as long as I can remember.

This may be true. It's not useful to say so in a query.

 

The ideas that shaped this novel often surfaced in the night, causing me to leap out of bed and take notes on a post-it stuck to a book next to my bed.

Also not useful in the query.

 

Now, as a 25-year-old high school English teacher with a Bachelor of Arts in English Education, I finally had the tools to sit down and finish it.

Also not useful

 

The manuscript is complete and ready for review.

I hope so, cause if you're querying an unfinished book, its an automatic pass.

In other words, no need to  state the obvious.

 

And review means something else. You're submitting your ms for consideration. But you still don't need to say so.

Agents do not generally care about how long you've loved to write or your process.

 

 I truly appreciate you taking the time to read my query,

Don't sound like I'm doing you a favor here.

I'm not.

I'm reading your query with the idea of becoming extremely wealthy by the sweat of your brow.

 

 

and I look forward to the possibility of hearing from you. 

Yea, my colleagues are notorious for no response means no which I find highly objectionable.

But let's not give them leave to do that by acknowledging it. Let them sauté in their own shame.

 

Thank you for your consideration, 

 

Unfortunately you've got a novel that has all the aspects of every other portal fantasy, and nothing that makes it distinctly your own.

 

That's the challenge to all writers. Fresh and new doesn't mean stories we've never seen. It means a different take or a different approach.

 

First Blood is essentially a fresh look at Beowulf.

Clueless is a new way to tell the story in Emma.

 

Every Jack Reacher novel is a Western, really: A stranger comes to town, shakes things up, then leaves.

A Western with no horses, no six-guns, no cattle rustlers. In other words, a fresh take.

 

So the problem here isn't the query. It's the novel.

Time to think about what you can change to put your own distinct spin on a portal fantasy.

 Think about what prompted you to write this. What do you want to say that hasn't been said before. 

As for your question: The problem is not lack of detail. It's too much detail. Agents don't expect to know everything about the book from the query. The query is the introduction, a brief taste of the meal that is the book.

You need to pare down here, but also figure out what makes your book distinctive, and get that on the page.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Revision #1

 

 

Dear Query Shark:

 

Lily Carter has hid her singing voice away for years for fear of rejection.

Lily Carter has hidden, not hid.

 

These kinds of mistakes can fell your query before you know it.

If grammar and syntax aren't your forte, it's ok. It's not a sign of bad writing, or low character.

 

Just recognize that it's a stumbling block and make friends with Miss Picklepuss, the copy editor from hell. She'll help you remove these gremlins. It might cost some money, but this is something you do want to invest in.

 

Her best friend (now ex-best friend)

you don't need both of these.

Your reader will intuit that they were once best friends if she's now the ex-best friend.

 

Watch for this kind of over-writing.

 

 

made it clear she should never sing in public if she can help it.

Suggest taking this last part out just to give the sentence more drama.

 

So Lily sings only when she's sure no one else can hear her. Imagine her embarrassment when the new kid in town catches her in the act.

 

Imagine her embarrassment takes us out of the narrative.

You're telling, not showing.

 

Avoid that.

 

She's embarrassed.

 

But embarrassed is such a tepid word for the plot point that's driving the narrative.

Here's a good place to get out the Thesaurus and dig around for more vivid words.

 

mortified

humiliated

(and there are others, take your pick)

 

Already at odds with Jack Sutton after an encounter with him at school, Lily expects nothing but scorn from him.

Again, pare out what you don't need.

This is the meat and tater tots of revising. Early drafts are almost always too long. Pare out everything you don't need.

 

But instead of making fun of her, he compliments her, throwing all her preconceived notions about what a terrible singer she is into question. 

It's NOT a preconceived notion, is it? It's what someone told her (someone with some sort of malevolent agenda it sounds like.)

 

Internal conflicts in a query are huge red flag. It tells me you don't have a handle on the plot, and the full manuscript may not hold together very well. Again, here's where Miss Picklepuss can be of great value.

 

 

Suddenly, the aggravating yet undeniably charming Jack keeps is popping up all over the place. At school, at church, and then there’s the real icing on the cake. It turns out that Jack is the brother of her new best friend.

Do we need to know any of this?

 

This next sentence connects to the previous one more directly.

 

With a musical background himself and a dogged belief that Lily has talent, Jack makes it his mission to get Lily back on the horse. Or the stage, so to speak.

 

Consider:

Jack has a musical background himself, and seems to think Lily has talent.

He makes it his mission to get Lily back on stage.

 

There's a LOT to be said for starting your sentences with the subject, not burying it in a clause.

 

 

 

 

 

As Lily spends more time with Jack and his spirited sister Cat, a self-consciousness Lily didn't even realize she had developed begins to mend.

She didn't realize she was self-conscious about her singing?

Are you serious here? That just doesn't make sense unless Lily is blindingly un-self aware.

She's literally stopped singing outside of the shower.

 

She even gets up the courage to enter the high school talent show thanks to a little prodding from Jack and his agreement to help her prepare for the show. When Jack starts giving her singing lessons, Lily slowly begins believing in herself again.  

 

But Lily has a few obstacles to overcome. Like that pesky stage fright thing. Or the ex-best friend who unexpectedly resurfaces and tries to sabotage Lily’s chances. Or the growing feelings she’s developing for her best friend’s brother. Lily must rely on her friends, her family, and her new-found confidence in order to get ready for talent show day.

 

You've got a lot of stuff going on here, but not very much plot.

What's the problem here?

Lily has been told she shouldn't sing in public.

What problem does that create?

Then Jack comes along and tells her she does have a singing voice.

 

What problem does that solve?

 

TAKE A DEEP BREATH is a young adult novel complete at 60,000 words

You don't need to say it's complete.

That's assumed.

 

And this just doesn't feel YA to me. There's no sense of Lily or Jack learning to navigate in the real world. There's no real romantic element.

 

 

 

that portrays the sarcastic, yet vulnerable Lily along with her lovable family and kindhearted friends.

Sarcastic?

Not in these pages she isn't.

 

 

 

A story of personal growth with a touch of romance, this novel is similar to Maybe This Time by Kasie West or Eyes on Me by Rachel Harris.

 

I am a small town Minnesota gal, where a person can go from wearing a sweatshirt and wool socks one day to a tank top and sandals the next. This is my first novel.

 

Thank you for your time and consideration.

 

 

you've got a lot of concept but not enough story.

You need more plot on the page. The problem Lily faces, and the choices to solve, and what's at stake.

 

It will help if we see those things for Jack too.

 

You've only got 60K here so you've a got a LOT of room to add more depth.

 

 

 

******

Original query

This query is a completely revised one from the one I started with as that one got me a couple of partial requests, but nothing serious. Now, since I've started using this query, I haven't even gotten a nibble. 

In the first  53 words you have two problems that could lead to an immediate pass.

While agents aren't actively looking for reasons to pass if you give them two in short order, that's what's going to happen.

 

My first query was succinct but a bit commercial in my opinion. So I tried to offer a quirkier approach with this one.

 

 

 A bit commercial isn't a bad thing. Agents are looking for things they can sell (ie commercial).

 I did beef up my bio after reading your archives. 

141 words is about 100 too many. See notes below. An extensive bio doesn't make up for problems in the query so lets focus on that.

You also stated in the archives that queries should have at least 2 comps. Is it okay to comp an author instead like I did?  

 No, see notes below

 

 

Dear Query Shark:

People are creatures of habit. They take the same route to school every day, they buy the same brand of soap they always do, and they listen to the same radio station, day in and day out. And they also sit at the same school desk every morning in first period English class.

 

When I read this, I have no idea if you're querying for fiction or non-fiction.

That's a big problem when agents are getting dozens of queries a week.

Big problem = pass.

It's more effective to start with the character's name and what problem she faces

 

At least, that’s what Lily Carter used to do.

 

Consider instead:

People are creatures of habit.

Lily Carter is a creature of habit.

 

They take the same route to school every day, they buy the same brand of soap they always do, and they listen to the same radio station, day in and day out.

 

She takes the same route to school every day, buys the same brand of soap, listens to the same radio station, day in and day you.

 

 

 And they also sit at the same school desk every morning in first period English class.

And sit at the same desk every morning in first period English.

 

 

But when you revise like this the real problem becomes very clear.

You're describing someone who doesn't sound very interesting. In fact, she sounds dull as dishwater.

That's DEATH in a query, particularly in YA.

Death = pass.

 

Now, if there's a reason Lily is so methodical in her daily life, that would give her some depth.

Is this how she feels safe?

Did she read Gustave Flaubert and take his advice to heart: "Be regular and orderly in your life, so that you may be violent and original in your work."

Let's give Lily some context here.

 

 

 Until Jack Sutton just waltzed in and stole it right out from under her. The gentlemanly thing to do would have been to give it back. Instead, he refused to acknowledge her rightful claim of dibs and in the process managed to ruffle her feathers, push her buttons, flip her lid, and get her goat. If you know what I mean.

 

Because he sat in her chair?

Does this seem like a very intense reaction to something that's essentially not important?  It's not like he said her mum wears army boots.

 

So, Jack is the last person on earth that Lily wants witnessing her humiliating attempt at singing.

 

There's no connection here between Jack stealing her seat in English class and witnessing her humiliating attempt at singing.

 

How is it that Jack is in her life at all?

 

 

Lily has been very careful to keep her voice under wraps after receiving rejection at the hands of a close friend.

What was Lily trying to do that a close friend rejected her?

Specifics are much more compelling than generalities.

You don't want to be awash in too much detail, but you need more than you have here.

 

Surprisingly though, Jack challenges her belief of mediocrity. 

What he actually does is challenge her belief that her singing is mediocre.

You need razor sharp, precise sentences in a query.

 

He actually begins to make her question a lot of things. Like the idea that the talent show is out of her league. Maybe, it's not. Maybe, she could even win it.

 

Although there is the small matter of that pesky stage fright thing…

So far, there's nothing interesting about Lily, and she sounds rather like a basket case. This is a HUGE problem in YA that is character driven.

 

As Lily gets closer to Jack and his spirited sister Cat, a self-consciousness Lily didn't even realize she had developed begins to mend. Thanks to a little prodding from her new friends, Lily signs up for the talent show. 

 What does Jack see in Lily that he's investing time and emotional support in her?

But someone from Lily's past is determined to see her fail. 

This is absolutely out of left field. With no context it's like a big ink blot on the page.

Let's give the antagonist some more page time.

 

Lily must rely on her friends, her family, and her new-found confidence in order to overcome the obstacles in her way. 

What obstacles? I thought there was an antagonist trying to thwart her.

 

 

Take a Deep Breath is a young adult novel complete at 60,000 words that portrays the sarcastic, yet vulnerable Lily along with her lovable family and kindhearted friends. A story of personal growth with a touch of romance, this novel will appeal to fans of Kasie West.

You need to use titles, not authors. Those titles need to be recent, no earlier than 2019.

 

Your bio is 141 words. Given a query should be 250-300 you've spent a larger percentage of your word count on your bio and not your book.

 

I am a small town Minnesota gal, where a person can go from wearing a sweatshirt and wool socks one day to a t-shirt and sandals the next. With a penchant for staying in every night with my two cats and a DVD collection to rival a Blockbuster store (are there any of those in existence anymore?) one might be tempted to call me an introvert. If it weren't for my extroverted husband, I just might be. Kudos to him for getting me out of my comfort zone and making friends with the outside world. Who knew I would enjoy things like pickleball and Korean BBQ? (not at the same time, for heaven's sake). This is my first novel and

 

 

 I'm looking to team up with an agent who can help an eager, wide-eyed newcomer navigate the ropes of the literary world.

 

This kind of statement is counter-productive.

Agents see this as code for needy and naive.  Even if you are these things, they're not something you'd put in your bio.  Remember a query is also about the agent assessing if you're someone they want to work with. Someone who clearly will need a lot of hand holding is less likely to get a nod. Just leave this kind of statement out.

 

Thank you for your time and consideration.

 

 

 

This does not have enough edge to be YA.

It sounds middle grade to me.

 

There's no sense of Lily coming to terms with the larger world, or figuring out her place in it.

It's all character development and very light on plot.

 

There's not enough story on the page.

 

 

 

 

 

NEWS – As the holiday season approaches, Creality is thrilled to launch its biggest-ever Black Friday event! From October 21 to December 3 on the Creality Store and November 21 to December 2 on Amazon, enjoy record-low prices on an extensive range of 3D printers and accessories. Whether you’re a 3D printing enthusiast or a […]

NEWS – The Petromax HK500 is a pressure outdoor kerosene lamp invented in 1910. It’s hand-assembled in Germany and features temperature-resistant borosilicate glass and optional accessories that will turn it into a heater and a stove. The one quart tank has a burning time of 8 hours and a light output of 500 CP (candle […]

REVIEW – If you spend any time with a vehicle in the outdoors, you’ll encounter a need for a shovel.  It can be for digging out of a snowbank, cleaning out a fire pit, or for me most recently, seeing an awesome patch of wild roadside black eyed susan and bee balm (wild flowers) to […]

REVIEW – One of the nice experiences when buying a new smartphone is choosing nice cases that are not only attractive but provide protection and create a good gripping surface. Let’s see how this Smartish Gripzilla iPhone 16 Pro Max case works for me. What is it? The Smartish Gripzilla iPhone 16 Pro Max case […]

REVIEW – When you live in a somewhat secluded wooded area like I do, you want to be able to monitor your property when you’re home and away from home. I’ve had multiple security cameras around my house for years, but only in the past year have I “graduated” to PoE cameras, and I love […]

REVIEW – Staying comfortable outdoors has certainly evolved in the last dozen years. Gone are the days of having to start a fire to stay warm. (Fires are still wonderfully inviting and fun, just not efficient.) Ceramic heaters and radiant heaters have been used for a long time, but they are usually large and do […]

REVIEW – I’ve had my two Dell monitors for a while, but I’ve yet to find a monitor arm that fits the weight of my 32″ curved screen. I tried my heavy duty work arms, yet no matter how tight I made it, it would slide down and rest on the desk. The LiftSync Dual […]

REVIEW – I’ve been updating my EDC and talking about it on my YouTube channel for the past few months. My next category to discuss is flashlights and it turned out to be a good choice because I was recently offered the chance to review the SPERAS ARC Ti Titanium USB-C keychain flashlight. Let’s check […]

REVIEW – Fall is here, and the weather has turned chilly at night.  That means Christmas is coming soon, and before I can say “Jingle Bells” it will be time to decorate the house.  While many of the decorations in our house are traditions that have been used for years, we are always up for […]

REVIEW – My first smartwatch was the Pebble, which I found to be instantly invaluable by displaying my notifications right on my wrist and then letting me decide if they were important enough to pull my phone out. For me, this has been the primary function of my smartwatches to this day. Other functions and […]

REVIEW – Look at my fancy coffee maker! The PINKAH Stainless Steel French Press Coffee Maker is a contemporary take on the French Press design that features an innovative leakproof pouring mechanism and a double-walled design that keeps your beverages hot for hours. We love all the coffee things, so let’s learn more. To the […]

REVIEW – Sleeping with a mask on may be the greatest thing I ever learned to do.  I sleep longer because there’s no light to wake me up and I fall asleep faster because it kind of “triggers” sleep.  I can fall asleep anywhere, and it’s so helpful that sometimes if I need a quick […]

REVIEW – 3D printing is fun and challenging. You can download countless free files from sites like Thingiverse and Printables, Cults 3D, and Thangs, or create your own using Fusion 360 TinkerCAD. It takes time, patience, and a love of tinkering, but it can be great fun. Many 3D printing enthusiasts will agree that incessant […]

REVIEW – There seems to be a number of different form factors popping up with projectors recently. Very slim projectors, portable cubes, and today’s variation which looks more like a spotlight than a projector at first glance. The XGODY Gimbal 3 projector looked like a fun projector to try out and looked very portable. Read […]

REVIEW – I previously reviewed The James Brand Carter XL which has been a dependable knife but I also have a penchant for utility knives so when The James Brand sent me their new Palmer Clear utility knife that retails for only $39 I couldn’t wait to try it out. What is it? The James […]

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COVER REVEAL!!! So over-the-moon excited to share with you the cover of my next cozy fantasy, THE ENCHANTED GREENHOUSE! Gorgeous art by Lulu Chen and design by Esther S. Kim. With cool mint sprayed edges!! Coming July 2025 from Bramble!

THE ENCHANTED GREENHOUSE is set in the same world as THE SPELLSHOP. It's about Terlu Perna, the librarian who created Caz and was transformed into a wooden statue as punishment. That should have been the end of her story. Yet one day, Terlu wakes up...

I am so absolutely in love with the cover, and I can't wait for this book to be out in the world!

Now available for pre-order!

http://www.sarahbethdurst.com/EnchantedGreenhouse.htm

Last week we received Hues and Cues from The Op Games. We recently finished playing through Scooby-Doo Escape from the Haunted Mansion (a fantastic game in The Op Games catalogue designed by Jay Cormier, Sen-Foong Lim, and Kami Mandell that you should absolutely pick up to play with your family) and wanted to give another game from the same publisher a go. I picked Hues and Cues because I’ve been pleasantly surprised by other “test whether our minds think the same way” games such as The Mind  and Wavelength.

In Hues and Cues, players gather around a large central board comprised of 480 graduating colors of the rainbow surrounded by an x-y axis and scoring table. White and black (which are technically not colors) are conspicuously absent as are shades (mixtures of color + black; e.g., grey) and tints (mixtures of color + white; e.g., cream).  On each player’s turn, they draw a card with four colors and the x-y axis codes of those colors depicted and they select one.

They are in the role of the clue giver. They attempt to convey which one they selected using a one word clue without directly pointing to it, naming its x-y axis, or using basic color references such as “yellow” or “green”. After they’ve provided their clue to everyone, each of the other players gets to select and mark a color on the board with their token that they think is the one to which the clue giver was referring. Then the clue giver gets a second shot at leading everyone to the correct color and this time they follow the same rules except that they can use a two word clue if they wish. Once again, all of the other players select and mark a color. After everyone has finished marking colors, the clue giver lays a 3x3 square cutout over top the board so that the color they were giving clues against lies directly in the middle. Any player who has a marker in that spot gets 3 points, any player who has a marker in one of the surrounding 8 spots gets 2 points for each marker of theirs in that area, and finally, any player who has a marker in one of the 16 spots surrounding the cutout gets 1 point for each marker of theirs in that area. Meanwhile, the clue giver scores 1 point for every marker (of any player)
inside the cutout.

Just as with Wavelength, Hues and Cues reinforced the absolute truth that we all think a bit differently. When I say lilac and imagine the corresponding color, it’s likely that it’s at least a few steps away on the board from the color you imagine. Ditto for emerald and periwinkle. And don’t get me started on apricot, as we had a big debate among 4 players on exactly which color square corresponds to that. Then there are misunderstandings in the clues themselves. In our group this happened when a clue giver said robin and I assumed they meant the dominant color of the bird (orange) but they were thinking of the iconic eggs of the bird instead (a shade of blue). It also happened that time a clue giver said bazooka and I assumed they meant the rocket launcher (brown) and they were thinking of the bubble gum (pink). 

Overall, I think Hues and Cues is a fine party game. My core gaming circle enjoys heavier strategy games, but we often look to a party game to start off our evening and get everyone comfortable before breaking into smaller groups to play the brain busters. Hues and Cues  works well for us in that role. I prefer Wavelength ever so slightly over Hues and Cues so if you’ve only got the budget to add one more party game to your collection I’d lean in that direction, but if you’re open to a couple of games or if you already have Wavelength and want something a little different, pick up Hues and Cues. One thing I really appreciate about Hues and Cues is that its language independent. As long as all players speak a common language, it doesn’t matter what that language is. You could even easily use sign language to give the clues. In this way, it’s especially a great game to bring into your collection if you host international board gamers (I’m looking at you, game cafe owners and Air B&B hosts!). Please note: while it should be obvious, this is not a game for the colorblind.

You can pick up Hues and Cues  at Amazon for under $25.

-------------------------------------------------

Publisher: The Op Games
Players: 3-10
Actual Playing Time (vs the guideline on the box): ~25 minutes
Game type: party games

Rating scale:
OUI: I would play this game again; this game is ok. I probably would not buy this game myself but I would play it with those who own it and if someone gave it to me I would keep it.
OUI OUI: I would play this game again; this game is good. I would buy this game.
OUI OUI OUI: I LOVE THIS GAME. I MUST HAVE THIS GAME.
NON: I would not play this game again. I would return this game or give it away if it was given to me.

Earlier this summer, Tokyo Sidekick arrived on our doorstep from Japanime Games. I knew absolutely nothing about the game before it showed up. Turns out, it's a big game, with a big board, in a big box. Unpacking everything, I was pretty impressed with the breadth of inventory. Check out the pic below from the publisher of the core game components beyond the board and cardboard standees.

My copy also included a comic book giving the origin stories of the heroes, as well as upgraded acrylic standees. The components are well made and I particularly like the acrylic upgrades; you’ll want these for sure if you can get them.

 

Perusing the rulebook, I started to get a good understanding of Tokyo Sidekick. It’s a cooperative game designed by Yusuke Emi where 2-4 players take on the role of heroes and sidekicks who battle against villains, supervillains, and menaces, while also navigating around the central board to deal with incidents as they crop up. There’s a lot going on at once for players to manage, and that’s part of the fun. It feels a lot like playing Pandemic, if the characters we played in Pandemic  were more personable and relatable. 

Turns pass back and forth between players and during the active player’s turn they must do their best using their array of selectable actions (actions that are paid for with energy cards  from their deck) to thwart evil and handle critical incidents that have been revealed. We didn’t find there to be much analysis paralysis during turns. At the end of each player’s turn, during the End Phase, new incidents are added to the board, the player redraws their hand, and circumstances are evaluated to determine whether additional steps grouped under something called “Crime Time” will occur. If it does occur, special effects on enemy cards activate, towns on the map get destroyed, a subset of incidents on the board become critical (if you leave these unresolved on the board for too long, you lose the game automatically), new enemies are revealed from the enemy deck and placed on the board, and new incidents are added to the incident row (to be added to the board on future turns).

What I love most about this game is the detailed descriptions and backstory on every hero and sidekick. Chamaru is my absolutely favorite sidekick to include on my team. Look at his adorable profile!

There’s even a mind map at the end of the rulebook showing the intricate connections between each hero and sidekick in the game. The artwork is lovely too. Sometimes I’m a bit hesitant when a new Japanime game is released because I never know if the artwork is going to push boundaries a bit too far out of the family friendly genre (which is always a shame when it happens because the gameplay is usually solid). Happy to report that while the game isn’t going to win any awards from the feminist corner for empowering representation, it’s nothing too risque; tweens and teens can play this without being scandalized.  Another thing I really enjoy about Tokyo Sidekick is the free lesson in Tokyo geography. All the locations on the board are neighborhoods of Tokyo, like Otsuka, Waseda, or Shinjuku. If you thought Pandemic was good at teaching you world geography, this game is really good at teaching you the areas of Tokyo as you move between them.

The rulebook is very detailed and well written. We didn’t have any trouble understanding the instructions and we weren’t left with any unanswered questions after reading it.

The myriad of hero-sidekick combinations and the variety of enemies in the enemy deck make the game highly replayable. We’ve played a handful of times and have yet to even eke out a win but we never got tired of trying. The first time we played we didn’t stay on top of incidents and then after that we tried to manage our incidents better but were overrun with villains. I’m sure there some clever strategy to score a victory in Tokyo Sidekick, but we haven’t stumbled upon it yet. Which is another plus for the game as far as I’m concerned; there’s no easy win to be had here. You’re going to have to collaborate closely with your team partners and really put your heads together to beat this thing.

This is definitely a game to put on the shopping list, if you’ve not ordered it yet. The Kickstarter for Tokyo Sidekick  just closed the first week in September, but Japanime has already started taking pre-orders for the retail version of the game on their website. If you’ve got tweens, I especially think this is a must-have. The whole family can work together to save Tokyo and learn Japanese geography in the process.

-------------------------------------------------

Publisher: Japanime Games
Players: 2-4
Actual Playing Time (vs the guideline on the box): About 75 minutes.
Game type: deck building, cooperative, hand management

Rating:

Jenni’s rating scale:
OUI: I would play this game again; this game is ok. I probably would not buy this game myself but I would play it with those who own it and if someone gave it to me I would keep it.
OUI OUI: I would play this game again; this game is good. I would buy this game.
OUI OUI OUI: I LOVE THIS GAME. I MUST HAVE THIS GAME.
NON: I would not play this game again. I would return this game or give it away if it was given to me.

Before the pandemic trapped us all in our homes, I spent many an hour at our local United Action for Youth center in Iowa City volunteering as a board game coordinator. Every month, I’d bring a few games with me and introduce them to the teens who hung out at the center after school. One of the games that got rave reviews from the group is Artsee.  Designed by J. Alex Kevern, and published by Renegade Game Studios, it’s an easy to learn, quick playing card game with a small table footprint for up to five players. Each player takes on the role of an art gallery curator, attempting to build the most prestigious gallery in order to win the game. Galleries are built from individual exhibits (cards) that depict two or three paintings from different categories (abstract, landscape, portrait, or still life). In addition to the paintings, each exhibit also indicates a featured category. Each time an exhibit is played to one of the four columns in a gallerist’s tableau, all opponents of the active player may deposit a meeple, representing a gallery visitor, on each exhibit in their gallery that has the same featured category as the exhibit the active player just laid down. Next, the active player scores points (prestige) for any visitor meeples that were previously located on the top most exhibit of the column they just added their exhibit to. The meeples are removed and returned to the active player’s general supply when this occurs. The active player also scores prestige for the number of  paintings in the column to the left or right (as indicated by the direction of the arrow on their exhibit card) of their just-placed exhibit that match the featured category of the exhibit card. If the player earns enough prestige during their turn (5-9), they may also claim a masterpiece painting token. These tokens are worth prestige at the end of the game during final scoring and also count as another painting of the chosen category when added to a column in the  gallerist’s tableau. Once a player has played an exhibit, earned prestige, and claimed a masterpiece token (if eligible), they draw a card and play passes to their left.

The gameplay continues until there are no more cards left to draw and all player hands are empty.  We found that turns progressed pretty quickly, with little to no analysis paralysis. Prestige bonuses are calculated at game end based on the number of masterpiece tokens accumulated. Each player adds their bonus to the prestige tokens they earned during the game. Don’t forget to also count the prestige on each masterpiece token. The player with the most prestige is the winner. 

While the components for Artsee  are nothing special, the artwork is well done (it’s comprised of reproductions of famous artwork with humorous twists). And it’s true that the art gallery theme seems to be just pasted on.  But at core,  Artsee  is a relaxing and fun little logic puzzle that doesn’t get boring, even after repeated plays. It’s especially fun to play with tween and teens and at under $25, makes an affordable holiday gift.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Publisher: Renegade Game Studios
Players: 2-5
Actual Playing Time (vs the guideline on the box): about 30 minutes per game
Game type: card game, set collection

Rating:

Rating scale:
OUI: I would play this game again; this game is ok. I probably would not buy this game myself but I would play it with those who own it and if someone gave it to me I would keep it.
OUI OUI: I would play this game again; this game is good. I would buy this game.
OUI OUI OUI: I LOVE THIS GAME. I MUST HAVE THIS GAME.
NON: I would not play this game again. I would return this game or give it away if it was given to me.

Six months ago I didn’t even know what a tower defense game was and now I’ve played two of them several times and have some strong opinions on each one. In this post, I want to talk to you about one of them - Kingdom Rush: Rift in Time. The good folks over at Lucky Duck Games sent me a review copy of the game, designed by Helana Hope, Sen-Foong Lim, and Jessey Wright.

Now I mentioned that this is a tower defense game, but what exactly does that mean? In games using this type of mechanic, one of the primary objectives is to continually defend your assigned sector of the board (i.e. your home base) against incoming threats. This is managed through the use of armed towers, which reign down violence and death on any malicious parties approaching. This mechanism got its start in 1980's video games (source: Wikipedia) and is one of the most popular mechanisms in modern game apps on cell phones and tablets. More recently, it's crossed over into the tabletop board game industry, with the earliest tower defense games appearing in 2013.

Kingdom Rush: Rift in Time was funded on Kickstarter in 2019 to the tune of over a million dollars. It's derived from an app (Kingdom Rush) originally published for the browser and iOS by Ironhide Game Studio back in 2011. There are 58+ million users who have downloaded and reviewed the app on Metacritic so the built-in audience for the board game from the existing app users alone could potentially keep the publisher churning out boxes indefinitely (how long does it take to produce millions of copies of a board game?!). With a retail price approaching $60, even with licensing fee expenses, I imagine it's a lucrative project for Lucky Duck. But is it a good purchase decision for board game enthusiasts who've decided they want to add a tower defense game to their collection?

Well, it depends on what kind of board gamer you are.

Let's dig in a little deeper.

Regular readers know theme is very important to me. Is there a good narrative explaining our roles in the game and a plausible backstory to illuminate how we got into the position we are in and why we are doing what we're being asked to do in the game? For Kingdom Rush: Rift in Time, the answer is yes to both. There's a time mage who has opened up a rift in the fabric of time, hell bent on taking down our kingdom and our job is to stop the mage before they can do so. It's simple yet compelling call to heroism.

The artwork, by Mateusz Komada and Katarzyna Kosobucka, is cartoonish and playful. It definitely has that cell phone app flavour to it.

The components are average for the price point or for a mass market game. And here's where we begin to tie things to what kind of board gamer you are. If you've been playing higher end games lately (those typically with a retail price over $100), the components might feel a bit flimsy and look a bit cheap. They're comprised of colorful cardboard tokens and boards, plastic figures, plastic trays, a handful of wooden meeples, and many (thin) cardstock cards.

If your tastes or budget gravitate toward games at a similar price as Kingdom Rush: Rift in Time, I don't think you'll find anything problematic about the components here and on that criteria, this is a good tower defense game for you. Happy bonus: among the components is a campaign progress map and stickers that allow players to mark their accomplishments as they play through the campaign. As a person who likes to check off boxes, I adore this feature. Kudos to the designers for the thoughtful addition.

I also really appreciated the player aides provided - the summary of steps in a round printed on the hero boards, and the helper cards that detail the various enemies.

  The gameplay is simple enough that it doesn't take long to set up or learn the rules. In each round of this cooperative game, players spawn new hordes of enemies marching on the kingdom, play tower and hero cards to attack the hordes, check to see whether any hordes have been destroyed (and remove them if so, reaping the crystal rewards), move the surviving hordes closer to the kingdom, pick up the surviving tower and hero cards played, and spend crystals to buy more tower cards. Rinse, repeat for every round. The individual monsters within a horde have different rules for engagement (for example, some cannot be attacked by heroes and others are self healing) so players will need to vary their tactics when playing tower and hero cards. Also, instead of playing all your tower cards during a round, you can upgrade one or more of them and pass them to a fellow player to use next round. And instead of activating your hero's attack against a horde during a round, you can restore your hero's health if needed. Mixed in among the hordes are portals that the time mage wants to use to reach and breach the kingdom. If one of these portals crosses into the kingdom, the game is lost immediately. Conversely, for most scenarios included with the game (there are 10 in the base game and several expansions already available and each can be played on varying levels of difficulty, providing plenty of replay) all of the portals must be destroyed in order to win the game. You can also lose the game if enough of the regular hordes breech your kingdom, causing you to run out of kingdom hearts (health).

The rulebook, which is well written and illustrated, suggests playing the game on difficulty level 3, while Tom Vasel (respected reviewer) has recommended playing on difficulty level 1. So we took the middle road during all of our games and played on level 2. Even though we lost our first game because we didn't do enough upgrading of towers (the second portal that came out could only be attacked with towers we didn't own), we didn't feel there were any overly complicated nuances to the game that would take several plays just to learn. You can play this game with your teens and tweens and they'll do just fine. The puzzle aspect of figuring out the best place to establish each tower on the board to maximize the damage to the hordes is an excellent logic puzzle for young and old alike. So we return to our discussion of what kind of board gamer you are. Do you want a family friendly game you can play with your kids? If so, then this is a good tower defense game for you. Do you enjoy board games that don't require a steep learning curve when it comes to strategy? If so, then this is a good tower defense game for you.

To recap, Kingdom Rush: Rift in Time  is an accessible, affordable, family friendly tower defense game and board gamers who value those qualities would do well to pick up a copy for themselves. And of course, with the holiday season upon us, it's a smart choice for gifting as well. I'm glad we own a copy, and I plan to pick up the expansions to play with my kids.

For my friends who exclusively prefer complex gameplay that will take you many games to even begin to master and expensive components with a luxury look and feel, stay tuned for my review of Cloudspire, because that's the tower defense game for your cohort.

    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Publisher: Lucky Duck Games Players: 1-4

Actual Playing Time (vs the guideline on the box): approx an hour per game

Game type: cooperative, tower defense, tile placement

Rating:

Rating scale:

OUI: I would play this game again; this game is ok. I probably would not buy this game myself but I would play it with those who own it and if someone gave it to me I would keep it.

OUI OUI: I would play this game again; this game is good. I would buy this game.

OUI OUI OUI: I LOVE THIS GAME. I MUST HAVE THIS GAME.

NON: I would not play this game again. I would return this game or give it away if it was given to me.