coping

A Prefrontal->Periaqueductal Gray Pathway Differentially Engages Autonomic, Hormonal, and Behavioral Features of the Stress-Coping Response

The activation of autonomic and hypothalamo-pituitary-adrenal (HPA) systems occurs interdependently with behavioral adjustments under varying environmental demands. Nevertheless, laboratory rodent studies examining the neural bases of stress responses have generally attributed increments in these systems to be monolithic, regardless of whether an active or passive coping strategy is employed. Using the shock probe defensive burying test (SPDB) to measure stress-coping features naturalistically in male and female rats, we identify a neural pathway whereby activity changes may promote distinctive response patterns of hemodynamic and HPA indices typifying active and passive coping phenotypes. Optogenetic excitation of the rostral medial prefrontal cortex (mPFC) input to the ventrolateral periaqueductal gray (vlPAG) decreased passive behavior (immobility), attenuated the glucocorticoid hormone response, but did not prevent arterial pressure and heart rate increases associated with rats’ active behavioral (defensive burying) engagement during the SPDB. In contrast, inhibition of the same pathway increased behavioral immobility and attenuated hemodynamic output but did not affect glucocorticoid increases. Further analyses confirmed that hemodynamic increments occurred preferentially during active behaviors and decrements during immobility epochs, whereas pathway manipulations, regardless of the directionality of effect, weakened these correlational relationships. Finally, neuroanatomical evidence indicated that the influence of the rostral mPFC->vlPAG pathway on coping response patterns is mediated predominantly through GABAergic neurons within vlPAG. These data highlight the importance of this prefrontal->midbrain connection in organizing stress-coping responses and in coordinating bodily systems with behavioral output for adaptation to aversive experiences.




coping

The Best Tips For Coping With Depression

TIP! Enjoy some sunlight and fresh air to ease your depression. There have been studies done that have shown that if an individual does not spend enough time in the sunlight, their depression will actually get worse. You might feel like hope is lost if you’re depressed. You might feel as though you can’t be […]

The post The Best Tips For Coping With Depression appeared first on Complements For Health.




coping

Coping with Thoughts of Doubt

Frederica shares a reply on the subject of doubt to a visitor to her website.




coping

Coping with Anxiety

Fr. Nicholas and Dr. Roanne Louh tackle one of the most pervasive maladies facing our society - Anxiety. There were so many questions in the chatroom they couldn't get to them all so they will do a part 2 on February 13, 2018.




coping

Coping with Difficult Relationships

Fr. Nicholas and Dr. Roxanne Louh have found that relationship issues are common to all of us and tonight they tackle the problem again. Great interaction on the phone with callers and in the chat room. You don't want to miss this episode.




coping

Coping With Depression

The chat room was full and the calls were many on this episode as Fr. Nick and Dr. Roxanne Louh tackle another one of the most wide spread struggles in our society today - depression.




coping

Coping With Fear

So what are you afraid of? Listen to this practical show with Fr. Nick and Dr. Roxanne Louh helping us to cope with our fears.




coping

Coping with Addiction

Another practical hour with Fr. Nick and Presbytera (Dr.) Roxanne Louh addressing the issue of addiction.




coping

Ten Steps For Coping With Grief

Fr. Nick and Dr. Roxanne Louh offer help in coping with grief by suggesting these 10 steps: 1. Allow your feelings – through acknowledgement and acceptance without judgement. 2. Challenging Negative Thinking that leads to Guilt and the “what if’s” 3. Manage your expectations of others, rather than letting your expectations of others manage you. 4. Have a support team and use them. 5. Stay active, set small daily goals. 6. Be intentional with caring for your basic needs. 7. Be thinking about your future even if you can’t formulate what it looks like now. Though a part of you died, a part of you still lives. 8. Avoid Absolutes 9. Allow Time to Be Inspired 10. Remain in faith




coping

Coping In A Dark World

News got you down? How do we cope in an increasingly dark world? Fr. Nicholas and Dr. Roxanne Louh have 6 specific suggestions for you.




coping

Coping with Depression

Fr. Nicholas and Dr. Roxanne Louh tackle the topic of depression, a potentially life-threatening mood disorder that affects 1 in 6 persons in the United States, or approximately 17.6 million Americans each year.




coping

Novice Programmers’ Coping with Multi-Threaded Software Design

Aim/Purpose: Multi-threaded software design is considered to be difficult, especially to novice programmers. In this study, we explored how students cope with a task that its solution requires a multi-threaded architecture to achieve optimal runtime. Background: An efficient exploit of multicore processors architecture requires computer programs that use parallel programming techniques. However, parallel programming is difficult to understand and apply by novice programmers. Methodology: The students had to address a two-stage problem: (1) design an optimal runtime solution to a given problem with no additional instructions; and (2) provide an optimal runtime multi-threaded design to the same problem. Interviews were conducted with a representative group of students to understand the underlying causes of their provided designs. We used qualitative research methods to gain refined insights regarding the students’ decision making during the design process. To analyze the gained data, we used content analysis tools. Contribution: The case study presented in this paper will help the teacher to stress the merits and limitations of various parallel architectures and confront students with the consequences of their solutions via performances’ benchmark. Findings: Analysis of the student’s solutions to the first stage revealed that the majority of them did not provide a multi-threaded solution ignoring the optimal runtime requirement. At the second stage, seven various architectures were provided differing in the number of involved threads, the data structures used, and the synchronization mechanism employed. The majority of the solutions were sub-optimal and only a few students provided an optimal one. Recommendations for Practitioners: We recommend conducting class discussions that will follow a task similar to the one used in this study. Recommendation for Researchers: To be able to generalize the received results this research should be repeated with larger study participant groups from various academic institutions. Impact on Society: Understanding the difficulties of novice programmers may lead to quality software systems. Future Research: To be able to generalize the received results this research should be repeated with larger study participant groups from various academic institutions.




coping

The Utilization of 3D Printers by Elementary-Aged Learners: A Scoping Review

Aim/Purpose: This review’s main objective was to examine the existing literature on the use of 3D printers in primary education, covering students aged six to twelve across general, special, and inclusive educational environments. Background: A review of the literature indicated a significant oversight – prior reviews insufficiently distinguish the application of 3D printing in primary education from its utilization at higher educational tiers or focused on particular subject areas and learning domains. Considering the distinct nature and critical role of primary education in developing young students’ cognitive abilities and skills, it is essential to concentrate on this specific educational stage. Methodology: The scoping review was selected as the preferred research method. The methodological robustness was augmented through the utilization of the backward snowballing technique. Consequently, a total of 50 papers were identified and subjected to thorough analysis. Contribution: This review has methodically compiled and analyzed the literature on 3D printing use among elementary students, offering a substantial addition to academic conversations. It consolidated and organized research on 3D printers’ educational uses, applying robust and credible criteria. Findings: Many studies featured small sample sizes and limited research on inclusive and special education. The analysis revealed 82 distinct research goals and 13 educational fields, with STEM being the predominant focus. Scholars showed considerable interest in how 3D printers influence skills like creativity and problem-solving, as well as emotions such as engagement and motivation. The majority of studies indicated positive outcomes, enhancing academic achievement, engagement, collaboration, creativity, interest, and motivation. Nonetheless, challenges were noted, highlighting the necessity for teacher training, the expense of equipment, technical difficulties, and the complexities of blending new methods with traditional curricula. Recommendations for Practitioners: To capitalize on the benefits that 3D printers bring, curriculum planners are urged to weave them into their programs, ensuring alignment with educational standards and skill development. The critical role educators play in the effective implementation of this technology necessitates targeted professional development programs to equip them with the expertise for successful integration. Moreover, 3D printing presents a unique opportunity to advance inclusive education for students with disabilities, offering tailored learning experiences and aiding in creating assistive technologies. In recognizing the disparities in access to 3D printing, educational leaders must address the financial and logistical barriers highlighted in the literature. Strategic initiatives are essential to democratize 3D printing access, ensuring all students benefit from this educational tool. Recommendation for Researchers: Comparative studies are critical to elucidate the specific advantages and limitations of 3D printing technology due to the scarcity of research contrasting it with other tools. The variability in reporting durations of interventions and research environments underscores the necessity for uniform methodologies and benchmarks. Because research has predominantly focused on STEM/STEAM education, expanding into different educational areas could provide a comprehensive understanding of 3D printing’s capabilities. The existence of neutral and negative findings signals an opportunity for further investigation. Exploring the factors that impede the successful integration of 3D printing will inform the creation of superior pedagogical approaches and technological refinements. Future Research: As the review confirmed the significant promise of 3D printing technology in enriching education, especially in the context of primary education, the imperative for continued research to refine its application in primary education settings is highlighted.




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Scoping and Sequencing Educational Resources and Speech Acts: A Unified Design Framework for Learning Objects and Educational Discourse




coping

Coronavirus coping

In the midst of the coronavirus pandemic, medical equipment is in short supply, and health workers in countries around the globe have had to ration care. Now, doctors and nurses in New York are treating patients in overcapacity intensive care units with dwindling supplies of equipment. The issue of how to ration scarce medical resources is forcing healthcare workers to make impossible decisions. But is there a best way to make those decisions? This is the subject of a recent article in The New England Journal of Medicine; one of its authors, Dr. Ezekiel Emanuel, has some thoughts.

Also, we visit a primate research centre in Louisiana where scientists are working on a potential Covid-19 vaccine; we ask how temperature and humidity affects the spread of the coronavirus; we find out how people around the world are stocking up their pantries; and we check out the dating scene to find out how it’s surviving in this global pandemic.

Photo: Mirian Fuentes (L), a medical assistant, and nurse Laurie Kuypers check paperwork during a COVID-19 screening at an appointment-only drive-up clinic set up by the University of Washington Medical Center Northwest Outpatient Medical Center. Credit: Karen Ducey/Getty Images.






coping

Designing public playgrounds for inclusion: a scoping review of grey literature guidelines for Universal Design.

Children's Geographies; 06/01/2023
(AN 164286252); ISSN: 14733285
Academic Search Premier





coping

Use of Linked Administrative Adult Social Care Data for Research: A Scoping Review of Existing UK Studies

Abstract Administrative data provide unique coverage of populations using care and the use of new datasets and advancing digital technologies only contribute to this growing area. There are ongoing limitations in the linkage of administrative datasets, which for adult social care have been exacerbated by inconsistent coding and varied IT systems. The aim of this […]

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  • Meta-analyses - Systematic Reviews

coping

Factors Influencing Palliative and End-of-Life Care for Adults with Intellectual Disabilities: A Scoping Review of Health and Care Workers’ Experiences

Volume 20, Issue 3, July-September 2024, Page 292-310. Read the full article ›

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  • Meta-analyses - Systematic Reviews

coping

The Use of Contribution Analysis in Evaluating Health Interventions: A Scoping Review

Evaluation &the Health Professions, Ahead of Print. Contribution Analysis (CA) is a promising theory-based evaluation approach for complex interventions, yet its application in health interventions remains largely unexplored. To bridge this gap, we conducted a scoping review to examine the extent of such applications and the methodologies, strengths, and limitations of this approach in health […]

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  • Meta-analyses - Systematic Reviews

coping

Evidence-based decision-making in the treatment of speech, language, and communication disorders in Down syndrome; a scoping review

Journal of Intellectual Disabilities, Ahead of Print. This scoping review examined available scientific evidence according to the PRISMA-ScR guideline on the subject of treatment interventions by speech and language therapists of speech, language, and communication needs in people with Down syndrome. A literature search in PubMed, Embase, Cinahl, Cochrane, and Web of Science yielded 41 […]

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  • Meta-analyses - Systematic Reviews

coping

To scope or not to scope? The benefits and challenges of integrating scoping studies in rapid qualitative research and evaluation

Publication date: February 2025 Source: Evaluation and Program Planning, Volume 108 Author(s): Syka Iqbal, Macarena Chepo, Marc Hébert, Cecilia Vindrola-Padros Read the full article ›

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  • Meta-analyses - Systematic Reviews

coping

The association between neighborhood socioeconomic deprivation and mental health in low- and middle-income countries: A scoping review

International Journal of Social Psychiatry, Ahead of Print. Background:Environmental research on mental health primarily originates from high-income countries, while information about the rest of the world remains limited.Aims:This study examined: (1) the available published research evidence regarding the association between neighborhood-level deprivation and indicators of mental health and illness in low- and middle-income countries (LMICs), […]

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  • Meta-analyses - Systematic Reviews

coping

Facilitators of and obstacles to practitioners’ adoption of harm reduction in cannabis use: a scoping review

Cannabis use can generate potential avoidable harms, hence the need for effective preventive measures and treatment. Studies show the efficacy of harm reduction (HR) in minimizing undesirable consequences asso… Read the full article ›

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  • Meta-analyses - Systematic Reviews

coping

The Nexus of Resistance and Neoliberalism in Social Work and Social Welfare: A Scoping Review

Affilia, Ahead of Print. This study intervenes in a growing scholarly dialogue about neoliberalism in social work and social welfare by addressing the undertheorized concept of resistance. We conduct a scoping review of 54 articles published from 2008–2023 to answer two questions: how is resistance discussed in relation to neoliberalism, and what are the practice […]

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  • Meta-analyses - Systematic Reviews

coping

School-Based Victimization Prevention Education Programs for Children and Youth With Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities: A Scoping Review

Child Maltreatment, Ahead of Print. Youth with intellectual and developmental disabilities (IDD) are at significantly higher risk of experiencing multiple types of interpersonal victimization across their lifespan compared to their peers without IDD. Despite the extensive literature on efficacy of prevention education programs for children without IDD, very little is known about comparable programs for […]

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  • Meta-analyses - Systematic Reviews

coping

Facets of Team Equity: A Scoping Review

Small Group Research, Ahead of Print. This article presents the findings of a scoping review looking at conceptualizations of team equity in academic literature between 2017 and 2021. A search and filter process produced a set of 42 publications containing discussion of equity or equality at the team level. A qualitative thematic analysis was carried […]

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  • Meta-analyses - Systematic Reviews

coping

Considering Sex, Gender, and Equity Factors in Methamphetamine Interventions: Findings From a Scoping Review

Objectives: Methamphetamine use is associated with numerous negative health and social concerns in Canada. Sex and gender-related factors play a crucial role in the uptake, patterns of use, responses, and treatment outcomes. This scoping review examines academic evidence on methamphetamine interventions that incorporate sex, gender, trauma, and/or equity elements. Materials and Methods: Research question #1 […]

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  • Meta-analyses - Systematic Reviews

coping

Global Expectations for Bystander Intervention in Domestic Violence: A Scoping Review of Governmental Policies and Community Resources in Eight Countries

Abstract Purpose Over recent years, expectations for bystanders to intervene to interrupt or prevent domestic violence have increased. However, the extent of these expectations and the ways in which bystanders are supported to uphold these expectations remain ambiguous. Drawing on a scoping review methodology, this study aims to map the bystander expectations and advice contained […]

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  • Meta-analyses - Systematic Reviews

coping

Organizational Change in the Nonprofit Context: A Scoping Review of the Literature

Nonprofit and Voluntary Sector Quarterly, Ahead of Print. This scoping review takes stock of the landscape of organizational change research in the nonprofit context. Focusing on research published in leading peer-reviewed journals in nonprofit and civil society studies, we extracted 111 published articles from 1973 to 2019. Our findings provide a comprehensive overview of the […]

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  • Meta-analyses - Systematic Reviews

coping

A 27‐year scoping review of practice and research in online counselor education

Abstract A scoping review of the online counselor education scholarship from 1997 to 2023 in 27 national and regional peer-reviewed counseling journals yielded a sample of 110 articles. Findings of the scoping review detailed the topics addressed, methodological features, key findings, and recommendations for practice and research. Read the full article ›

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  • Meta-analyses - Systematic Reviews

coping

Exploring Parents’ Experiences and Needs During Disclosure of a Cerebral Palsy Diagnosis of Their Young Child: A Scoping Review

ABSTRACT Background Parents often perceive the news that their child has cerebral palsy (CP) as overwhelming and shocking. They are at increased risk of parental stress and mental health problems, which in turn can affect the interaction between the parent and the child. Parental mental health outcomes are known to be affected by the process […]

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  • Meta-analyses - Systematic Reviews

coping

A Loss Cycle of Burnout Symptoms and Reduced Coping Self-Efficacy: A Latent Change Score Modelling Approach

Chronic Stress, Volume 8, Issue , January-December 2024. Police officers are frequently faced with chronic and acute stressors, such as excessive workload, organizational stressors and emotionally charged reports. This study aims to examine the relationship between a form of chronic strain (ie, burnout symptoms) and a resource (ie, coping self-efficacy) in a sample of Dutch […]

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  • Open Access Journal Articles

coping

‘An Unprecedented Disruption’ — How Adolescents Are Coping With the Pandemic

As millions of adolescents head back to school, what can science tell us about how the isolation and upheaval of the past year-and-a-half have affected their mental health and development?




coping

Coping with the tide of everyday operations

Safety professionals work diligently to engage both leaders and employees. But there is often a challenge: leaders wish their employees would just "be careful" without doing diligence to hazard identification, assessment and control. The result: workers claim leaders are only concerned with productivity and budgets.




coping

MorganHill Launches ISO 27001 Scoping & Gap Assessment Workbook to Kickstart Organizations' ISO 27001 Journey

MorganHill, a leading provider of information security solutions, proudly announces the release of its new ISO 27001 Scoping & Gap Assessment Workbook, designed to help organizations embark on their journey towards ISO 27001 certification.




coping

MorganHill Launches Comprehensive ISO 27001 ISMS Certification Scoping & Gap Assessment Workbook

MorganHill, a leading provider of information security solutions, is proud to announce the launch of its new ISO 27001 ISMS Certification Scoping & Gap Assessment Workbook




coping

A3: Coping with Forms: Implementing a Web Form Management Application

Creating good forms is a tricky business encompassing a wide range of disciples (accessibility, usability, security, etc). What's more, the development of bespoke online forms, and their back-end reporting interfaces, can be a huge resource drain for institutional Web teams. This session will tackle these problems by asking 'what do we need to know to make better forms, and how can we better manage form development processes'? As a case study, we will look at how the implementation of a form building and management application has aided the Web team at City University. The session was facilitated by Dan Jackson, City University.




coping

The impacts of COVID-19 on global food security and the coping strategy [in Chinese]

Article PDF (download)




coping

Integrated and enhanced datasets on food security and household coping strategies in the G5 Sahel Countries (2018-2023)

The objective of this analysis is to gain more insight into the coping behavior of households in Mali when facing covariate shocks and stressors of different kinds Source: IFPRI Africa Regional Office (AFR)




coping

Integrated and enhanced datasets on food security and household coping strategies in the G5 Sahel Countries (2018-2023) Copy

The objective of this analysis is to gain more insight into the coping behavior of households in Mali when facing covariate shocks and stressors of different kinds Source: IFPRI Africa Regional Office (AFR)




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Coping with Anxiety and Uncertainty at Work

We often try to push away stress, fear, and anxiety. But success doesn't depend on rejecting these emotions — we can thrive because of them.




coping

By fire, water, earth, air in "Coping in a red state" on Ask MeFi

Let me tell you a story about a woman I know who votes conservative. She isn't the type of person I would self-select to be a friend, or even a friendly acquaintance — perhaps to my detriment! — because she's well-to-do, right-leaning, and very Christian. But I see her every week and have talked to her quite a bit because she's one of my medical providers.

Because I'm disabled, she charges me half of what she'd normally charge; every time I thank her, she says it's no big deal, and that, "Disabled people deserve every break they can get!" This saves me something like $3,000 dollars a year: that's an extra $3,000 a year she could be making, and actually now can't be making, because she's using her hours to treat me instead of other patients. She does a lot of volunteering. Donates a lot of money. She talks about how she's disappointed that certain social services, like disabled transit, fail disabled people, and has a fairly robust understanding of how that plays out because she listens carefully to her disabled patients. In her church, she's taken a stand for welcoming gay members of the community into the congregation, and into leadership positions, and was heartbroken and felt powerless and bewildered when the higher-up leadership blocked several of these things.

Whenever I've talked about the difficulties my trans friends are facing, she is genuinely sympathetic to the individual friend, interested in their life, and sad about their suffering, but sometimes expresses the concern-trolling talking points of the right-wing media — I read this as her being very responsive and caring to any unique individual she knows, but not recognizing the perils of the wider systemic discrimination going on.

Last time there was an election, I was talking about how conservative funding cuts impact the disabled community, and she expressed a lot of opinions along the lines of, "Of course I think everyone who needs disability income should have it! But don't you realize that the left-wing government will get us further into debt, whereas the conservatives will improve the economy so that we have more government funds to give social programs?" This coming from a person whose personality is very caring, motherly, and friendly, not at all a combative or hostile "debater:" normal people genuinely believe these things because the right-wing media repeats them over and over again.

I think that you really are right when you say, I truly believe they are good, kind, thoughtful people. Most of them probably are. But they are being lied to and duped by right-wing politicians, and not realizing the extent to which they're being lied to, because they believe we still live in a reasonable society in which no one would actually lie that much ... so some of the things they're saying must be true, right?

They don't realize the extent to which BIPOC, queer, disabled, immigrant, etc. minority groups are in very real danger, and think it must be exaggerated, because they don't really know that many, or the few that they know appear to be doing just fine. And so they vote with their worry and their fear, and their vote does not truly carry through their intentions about the kind of world they wish to live in.

This is not, of course, all people. Some people really are deep into right-wing ideology and have entire groups that they do not see as real people. But I find that most of the people I meet are like her: I could have several conversations with them not knowing they are right-wing, and get along with them just fine, because their day-to-day values of how to treat other human beings really are quite similar to mine. But because of their political/cultural education, their sociological and media literacy, and the demographics of people that make up their workplace, friends, and family, they are being fed a different set of facts, a different "reality."

This all makes me incredibly sad but also gives me bit of hope, and I hope it will bring some peace to you.

I live in Canada, so it's not the same, but I do live in one of the most right-leaning provinces. I really feel what you're going through. I am also surrounded by people I care about — who appear to care about me — who vote in one awful conservative government after another. Stay strong: sending love and sympathy.




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By MiraK in "Coping in a red state" on Ask MeFi

My situation is not exactly the same as yours but it is a story of how to get along with friends and family who are on the total opposite side of the aisle, so perhaps you can find something to help you in my strategies.

My parents are extremely right wing - in India. It is mortifying and horrifying enough that they are this way but to make things worse my mother is also deep into conspiracy theories on a similar scale and off-the-charts-insane like QAnon in the US. At the same time I am also still engaged in a decade-long effort to build a decent relationship with my parents. So even though this is a self-imposed form of hell, the fact remains I am trying to actively love (as in verb-love) these people whose political opinions horrify me and who ruined their relationship with me in the past by throwing me out of their home as a teenager, abusing me as a child, etc.

Step 0 in accomplishing this task is to actually be clear, honest, and fully committed with yourself that you do want to keep and build these relationships.

For many years I was on the fence about it and I made no effort at all to build a relationship with my parents. That was fine! If you are here, you are not doing anything wrong! And neither will you be doing anything wrong if you do choose to walk away properly from people who trigger you too much. Many years after not working and fence-sitting, I intellectually realized I wanted to fix things but emotionally I remained uncommitted, angry, resentful, and blisteringly mad about how unfair it was that *I* was the one doing this fixing and building. This was also a valid stage to go through, and I suspect you're somewhere around here, feeling angry and hurt and torn within yourself that these are your fucking choices: to learn how to get along with assholes or else to lose all your family and friends. The unfairness REALLY RANKLES. This is extremely valid and extremely real, and there is no way out of this stage but through it. But sadly, no forward movement will happen FOR YOU EMOTIONALLY in this phase, as far as making your peace with your situation goes. (Also no forward movement will happen in fixing the relationship but that is not necessarily a bad thing, if you're in this stage.)

Accomplishing Step 0 - becoming fully and truly committed to building and maintaining these relationships - is a hue, huge task in itself. I would strongly encourage you to work with a psychodynamic therapist or some other modality that pays attention to childhood issues, in order to get to Step 0. You will know you have reached Step 0 when you can "radically accept" that your friends and family voted against your life, your rights, and your wellbeing. That is who they are, this is what you are dealing with, and you no longer have any wish to wrestle with this reality (try to convince them, try to lead by example, try to explain yourself, try to talk to them, try to get them to acknowledge your pain or at least be forced to see it, etc) because you. just. fully. accept their political position is their political position - you accept their total separateness from you and you accept their right to be separate from you - and even though you may be angry, even though you may be hurt, even though you still hate their politics, you want to just get on with building the relationship. If you're there, then you can move on to

Stratagem 1: find things you enjoy about this person, and trying to do things you mutually enjoy with them. Even the smallest movement towards identifying and then amplifying the good (by having small good interactions) will help. Repeated good interactions are what finally defeated my insecurity about "giving my parents an inch" - it felt so threatening to me to have anything nice with these people against whom I was nursing so much anger, and I TREASURED my anger, I didn't want to lose it! Having repeated nice experiences made me feel like, okay, I still haven't lost my right to anger or my anger even though I am having fun with them. Both my anger and my love can coexist. This has been a HUGE relief.

Stratagem 2: stop talking politics with them entirely. These are not your politics buddies. FIND OTHER POLITICS BUDDIES YOU CAN RELIABLY GET SUPPORT FROM for the political side of you. This type of compartmentalization is a healthy practice because nobody can be everything to us. Nobody in our personal life can check all the boxes and be everything we need from the world. People's failings are sometimes located near the very things we consider "basic shit". They are human, and this is okay, and we can find others to fill this basic need for us.

Stratagem 3: This may seem like the opposite of Stratagem 2 but it is not - don't stay silent when your friends and family say horrible political things to you or around you. You don't bring up politics but you don't stay quiet when unacceptable things are spoken in your vicinity. You MUST say something, you MUST speak your mind. Make it short but make it honest. Otherwise you build up an incredible amount of resentment and anger that will poison the relationship and run counter to your Step 0 goals.

Stratagem 4: After you say it, move on without belaboring your point or trying to get them to agree with you. Say it, and then completely let it go. Saying it is the point. The goal is NOT to change them, move them, make them think like you, make them acknowledge you, make them apologize, etc. The goal is unburdening yourself by speaking your truth, protecting the relationship by not allowing thoughts to fester in secret. If what they have said is horrible, say, "Wow, that's pretty horrible," and then move on immediately - warmly, affectionately, taking the sting out of it with your manner, without holding a grudge. You get your satisfaction by speaking up, not by making them bend. This strikes a great balance between being authentic and yet sidestepping useless conflict.

Stratagem 5: If they want to argue with you, you have to learn how to bow out smoothly without engaging in that. Say things like, "Oh, dad, that's fine, we can let it go. Tell me about Auntie's health..." Again it is important to remain non-retaliatory, don't punish them for wanting to hash this out by being angry. Be calm and warm and affectionate, but do not be moved into engaging in the political discussion. Walk out and take a short break if you need to. But come back on your own as soon as possible, and be loving. These are your people. You have boundaries with them, not walls.




coping

Ask MeFi: Coping in a red state

I am devastated by the results of this election. I live in a red state, which I love, and I am surrounded by people I love who voted for Trump. I have given up trying to understand it. These people are my community. I truly believe they are good, kind, thoughtful people, and they voted for someone who is promising to do a lot of harm to other good, kind people. Any advice for coping? I can't cut them off, they are friends and family. Help.




coping

Health Tip: Coping With Early-Onset Alzheimer's

Title: Health Tip: Coping With Early-Onset Alzheimer's
Category: Health News
Created: 8/28/2012 8:05:00 AM
Last Editorial Review: 8/28/2012 12:00:00 AM




coping

Health Tip: Coping With Chickenpox

Title: Health Tip: Coping With Chickenpox
Category: Health News
Created: 8/24/2015 12:00:00 AM
Last Editorial Review: 8/24/2015 12:00:00 AM




coping

Health Tip: Coping With a Bump on the Back of the Heel

Title: Health Tip: Coping With a Bump on the Back of the Heel
Category: Health News
Created: 8/26/2015 12:00:00 AM
Last Editorial Review: 8/26/2015 12:00:00 AM