I’m a member of the Amazon “Vine Program”. If you’re unaware of it, this is a cool little channel Amazon run where top reviewers on Amazon’s website get to choose a couple of items from a pre-defined list every month, to receive for free. In return, you must review on the Amazon website at least three out of every four items you receive.

It’s a good programme, I’ve received a couple of dozen books from it over the years and it has this quality of both being free and serendipitous that book lovers should - and seemingly do - love. Publishers get lots of reviews on their product’s page, Amazon get UGC and the people who love to read and review books get free stuff. Win-win for everybody.

I’ve just received a very odd email from Amazon about it though. First, can I just say to whoever sent this out, that putting at the end:

Please note: This e-mail was sent from a notification-only address that cannot accept incoming e-mail. Please do not reply to this message

has made an error. They’ve sent it from order-update@amazon.co.uk which the above implies is you know, a fake, non-read email account. So why then is the email itself cc’ed to that address? I think somebody does read mail at that address. Smart anti-spam skills Amazon! Alas, the game is up!

Anyway, that’s not the really weird bit. It goes on:

We are contacting you to let you know that there have been some changes to the Amazon Vine Voice Participation agreement. 

Do we all get a free pony? Really, I love Amazon Vine, that’s the only way it could get better… Somehow when I get an email informing me of changes to T&Cs though, I always feel the rest of the email is going to be me being told off for something I didn’t do. It goes on:

Please note the following changes: 

1) The ownership status of Vine products and the circumstances in which you may dispose of Vine products has been clarified. Ownership of Vine products supplied by Amazon or one of its subsidiaries (such as AmazonEncore books, AmazonCrossings books and Amazon Basics) transfers immediately to you upon receipt of the item and you can dispose of them at your convenience, but you may not transfer ownership to another person at any time. In the case of products provided by other suppliers, the product supplier retains ownership for six months from the date of your review, after which you may keep or destroy the product, but again you may not transfer ownership to anyone else. 

Wait, what now? Amazon: do you know you’re dealing with people who know how to read? From http://wordnetweb.princeton.edu/perl/webwn?s=ownership:

ownership: the relation of an owner to the thing possessed; possession with the right to transfer possession to others

So, if they transfer ownership, they are transferring the right to transfer possession to others. That’s what the word means.

I can understand publishers and Amazon getting sniffy if review copies are flooding the market before release dates, but the answer to that is simple: make it policy that selling pre-release copies (and it’s obvious when you get a review reader copy), before the release of the actual book will result in you being evicted from the Amazon Vine programme.

I’ve never sold any of the items I’ve received on Vine. I love books, I collect books, and I’m happy that my collection grows at 2 books/month beyond what I buy at no cost to myself in return for a review on the website for the majority of them. I’ve had books I’ve loved, books I’ve hated, and books I’ve simply just not seen the point of and been indifferent to. But I have always considered those books mine on receipt, and without logging into the Amazon Vine site, I wouldn’t even be able to identify which books came from the programme any more. They do not sit on a special shelf, so when the time comes to start selling copies off, I’m not sure I can definitely state that in 10 years time I will not sell off an edition I received via Vine.

Because these books are typically first prints of first editions, if the book should become very popular, this of course means I might profit greatly from the transaction. Publishers don’t want that to happen. All I can say is, the great success of the book to get it to that point is in part thanks to us reviewers talking it up in its earliest days. Stop being so silly.

Whilst I also understand the need of publishers to make sure the hundreds of review copies they give away don’t reduce initial sales because the reviewers are all flogging them on Amazon or eBay, I think this is a little silly. Just ask reviewers to play fair, and we will. We’re not bad people.

In fact, make it a condition that selling anything within six months is a no-no. I don’t think we’d have a problem with that. But trying to redefine the meaning of the word “ownership”? That’s crazy talk.

It gets better though:

2) You may submit Vine reviews on other websites, but not to any online or offline channel that advertises or offers the Vine product for sale except in the form of a link to a website operated by Amazon or its affiliates. 

So if you get a free copy of a book from Vine, you love it, you tell all your friends about it, and you go onto forums that happen to be affiliated with Waterstone’s (or B&N in the states) rather than Amazon, you’re in breach of T&Cs.

Amazon are - I suspect - paid by the publisher to distribute their books via Vine. I can’t imagine they make a loss on it. Therefore, I can’t quite understand how it’s in the publisher’s interest for a reviewer to talk less about a book that they love. I also have no idea how Amazon intend to police this.

If I recommend a book to a friend whilst in a bookshop, do I also have to “subtly hint” in the conversation that the book is available on Amazon.co.uk don’t you know and that Amazon is really good, or is discussion of the book whilst in a bookshop to be met with a mute indifference by me? If not, it possibly means I am submitting a review in an “offline channel” in a context that “advertises or offers” the book for sale in a form that isn’t a link to Amazon.

My friend might actually buy the book on my recommendation right there and then. How is it in the publisher’s interest that I refuse to discuss it. What if I forget that I originally got my copy on Vine and the Amazon police are around the corner and get to hear of it? Will I be punished?

These two combined make the Vine programme a little more crazy than I thought, when you try and stick to the letter of the T&Cs as opposed to perhaps the spirit.

On receiving a book, I can only discuss it on Amazon or Amazon-affiliated websites and nowhere else and I must keep the book for ever more and not sell it, give it away, donate it, or let anybody else consider it theirs until the end of time.

I am permitted however, to set fire to it. Book-burning: the kind of party Amazon Vine approves! Just you know, don’t talk about the books unless you have a laptop open nearby with Amazon.co.uk up…

I ordered up two books last night on Vine I am looking forward to receiving. I suspect they may be my last. I simply can’t see how I can commit to complying with those two conditions in a sensible way until the end of time, and I’m not somebody who likes to know he might be breaching an agreement unintentionally.

Maybe one day somebody will see sense at Amazon or at the publishers and they’ll make this all a lot simpler: don’t sell the books within six months, and whilst you’re free to talk about them wherever you want, your first and primary review should be submitted on Amazon. Simple.